#even if it’s 4 months after questioning and 2 months after coming our
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i high key think my paretnrs might be getting divorced :((( they have been fighting basically every night since i can remember but they always fought so i just accepted it but they started to go sleep at other people’s houses more and mum went away for almost a week and dad keeps going on work trips and tonight is the first time this has happened for two times in a row dads car is just missing and they keep fighting always always always i sometimes can’t go to sleep bcs they are always talking and mum is always crying now even though the entire time before i was 10 she cried only once in front of me and that was when grandad died. my mum literally had to take my therapy appointment (which i really really needed bcs ive been feeling like absolute shit lately) for herself because she was feeling awful. its all dads fault i really dont like my dad anymore he was never emotionally present when i was younger and he’s still barely emotionally present now. i think there is a very good reason his first marriage went badly and i think there’s a very good reason that for almost 2 years all my stepsisters hated my dad and i think there’s a very good reason why the girls stopped coming over for weekends but its not like my mum is perfect she always defends my brother im always in the wrong when i get in trouble and shes very generous with school and stuff but she enables josh and his awful behaviour i feel like i cant have shit in this house i cant wait to move out
#i don’t think it helps that a lot of the periodic self hate has come back#i think about being a man every day consistently#whenever i look in a mirror whenever i put on clothes whenever i even feel clothes on my skin#i genuinely felt so awful wearing shorts today bcs i felt like everyone was judging me and thinking i looked awful#ive really fallen into this awful pit of self hate and i just dont know how to stop it#like ill look in a mirror and my forehead is too big my skull is too big my shoulders are to broad my hair is dogshit my adams apple is sji#my nose is shit my eyebrows are shit my lips are shit my chin is shit my ribcage is giant my hands are big my elbows are big#i feel so fat and awful and ugly and it’s just so ughhh#ive started seriously trying to lose weight again and ive dropped 2 kilos but i still feel the same if not worse#i feel like ill be happy at 50kg but deep down i know that ill never be happy with my weight#ive started to call myself a freak and a tranny in my head consistently which isnt good#i feel like everything i do socially is so awkward#i feel like everyone secretly hates me but they are just being polite because im that much of a freak that i need sympathy#the stupid self deprecating jokes and suicidal ideation that i thought i killed years ago are all coming back#at least now i have plans to diy#even if it’s 4 months after questioning and 2 months after coming our#i get some money in cash as well as some ritalin for exams and give it to aspen and they order it for me online#hopefully that goes well bcs there’s not a whole lot else going for me
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pairing: (ex)Harry Styles x Ginger Spice's daughter!reader x Max Verstappen
fc: Sabrina Carpenter
summary: They broke up and she decided to disappear and write a heartbreaking song. Through this process her old friends from F1 were with her. With one two-time World Champion getting closer and closer.
warnings: swearing, cheating, Harry is an asshole in this (sorry!)
a/n: Long? Oh yes. It's a long one. But also my first F1 related fic, hope you enjoy!
masterlist
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f1 and redbullracing
liked by yourinstagram, landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 349 392 others
f1 Is there a better way to start 2023 season than with YN YSN (sweetly called the tiny boss of Red Bull Racing) in the paddock? We say there is NOT! Welcome YN, we hope you have the best time with us!
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yourinstagram thank uuuuu!
danielricciardo THE boss is here!
landonorris *heart eyes*
charles_leclerc Welcome back, YN!
ynupdates oh how i missed her face
ynsmybestie 5 months without even a photo of her finger online... it was a draught
ynsmymama yn's a vroom vroom girlie?????
ynsmybabie F1? is she a fan? tiny boss? what is going on?
⤷ ynupdates I feel like I'm the only one that knew. YN is Christian Horner's (red bull racing boss) step-daughter.
⤷ ynsmybestie isn't his wife ginger spice?
⤷ ynupdates yes! she's YN's mum. how do you guys not know that?
⤷ ynshands maybe because she's using her grandma's surname and not her mother's?
formulafan49 so we're getting las vegas content in bahrain? this sport is getting out of control with all those celebrities attending
⤷ landonorizz why are you being bothered by somebody that knows almost everything about formula 1? go be mad somewhere else
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yourinstagram
liked by danielricciardo, landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 2 201 302 others
yourinstagram hiii💛 took a break and wrote a song. you're losing me is out now! i love all of you my pathological people pleasers.
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danielricciardo be a happy song with me?
⤷ yourinstagram running to you right now
⤷ landonorris bringing mum's biscuits
⤷ maxverstappen1 I'll bring myself 😊
⤷ danielricciardo you lot weren't invited, but come in... I guess
landonorris you're the only person I'm not mad at for making me cry, ynn
⤷ yourinstagram you've heard the song before, lan
⤷ landonorris shhhh
⤷ danielricciardo it won't make her fall in love with you, norris
⤷ landonorris fuck you man
maxverstappen1 💛💛
ynupdates WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED HERE
ynsmybestie I won't recover. I fucking won't recover
ynsmymama I'm gonna die... its so sad. its heartbreaking. I'm losing myself
hArrysbtch woah, my heart cannot take this
harrysmoustache firstly, break my heart and take it, yn
harrysmoustache secondly, why is the whole f1 here? wtf
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harryupdates
liked by hArrysbtch, harrysmoustache and 45 202 others
harryupdates In his latest interview Harry was asked about his private life - especially his relationship with YN. After the question of "do you feel like you throw a great love away?" Harry answered with "I don't know. I don't regret a lot of things in my life but that's [the relationship] probably one of them." You can read the interview via the link in our story!
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hArrysbtch suddenly a six year lasting relationship was a mistake???
hArrysbtch ehh, harry. i kinda feel that the breakup (from Harry's side) happened a long time ago. there is no sparkle anymore
hArrysbtch now let me start on not mentioning her name like EVER "my last partner" her name is YN, why he can't just say it? it's been going on for years. since they started dating really...
harrysmoustache that wasn't the best interview
ynsmymama about 'you're losing me': "every artist has their imagination that they write down and then release. sometimes it's good and sometimes it should be kept private. i'm not the one to size it up." THAT WAS FUCKING LOW
⤷ harrysmoustache as much as I love him that was petty af
⤷ hArrysbtch especially when almost all critics named this song one of the best LYRICALLY and MUSICALLY in the last few decades
ynshands "I don't know if you can be ready to move on from a longterm relationship. it's definitely harder than from something that lasts months or two years." THIS MOTHERF****R IS TALKING ABOUT NOT BEING THE ONE TO MOVE ON BUT HE DID WHILE STILL BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP??????
⤷ ynsmymama this is called audacity
⤷ harrysfan49 cheating was never confirmed, was it?
⤷ ynsmybestie yes, it was. right after harry's "announcement" yn posted a story with lyrics from 'illicit affairs'. i think that's enough of a confirmation.
ynsmybestie yeah, here he comes again not being able to fucking say her name. those 6 years meant nothing?
⤷ harrysfan92 maybe he doesn't want to share his private relationship online
⤷ ynsmybestie i don't understand that. you're loving a person for six years, claiming them the love of your life, but saying the name is hard? he never mentioned her in interviews (my closest friend, my partner, someone I love). he couldn even show up at her birthday party because he had a photoshoot. just to point out, the drivers showed up in London, even though they had a race in Imola the next day.
⤷ harrysfan87 you guys are toxic. just gonna blame him for the breakup? unbelievable.
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ynupdates
liked by ynsmybestie, landofan92 and 88 203 others
ynupdates YN AND LANDO AT THE NIGHTCLUB IN MONACO!!!!!
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ynsmybestie NO FUCKING WAY
ynsmybestie SHE LOOKS SO HOT
ynsmymama the way he looks at her ??? 🫠
ynsfan92 find somebody who looks at you just like lando looks at yn. YOU CAN'T
⤷ ynsmymuse have you seen how max looks at her?
landofan92 do I need to change my bio from norizz to yesrizz?
user39 yeah, moving on quickly when her exboyfriend is talking about how he adores her
⤷ ynsmybestie where??? because i only saw how awful he was to YN from the moment they broke up
user02 yeah, move on quickly and go trough all the drivers
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yourinstagram added to her IG story!
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lando.jpg
liked by yourinstagram, maxverstappen1 and 1 004 392 others
lando.jpg yn showed her favourites
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danielricciardo LIAAAAAR. SHE LOVES ME MORE.
⤷ yourinstagram of course
⤷ lando.jpg i love your sarcasm
maxverstappen1 💛
yourinstagram not my fault you were the only ones available for photos
⤷ maxverstappen1 I don't mind
⤷ lando.jpg neither do I
⤷ danielricciardo I DO
⤷ charles_leclerc I DO TOO
ynsmybestie hot
ynsmybestie but also i see you YN with favouring Max and Lando, i see you girl
ynsmymama why I've never realised how hot those two are???
ynshands is there a thing she does badly?
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ynupdates
liked by ynsmybestie, maxandyn and 68 574 others
ynupdates YN and MAX VERSTAPPEN at the bar tonight in Zandvoort, celebrating Max's win!
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ynsmybestie SEE? you defend the girl, you get the girl!
ynsmymama i mean i was rooting for them but i am still speechless
ynshands YAS PARENTS
maxfan85 after the race that he had, tying to yet another record and getting a girl? is there a thing he can't do or can't have??
ynsfan93 sooo, do we say they're together orrr?
⤷ ynsmybestie i mean, look at them. i have many friends but i'm not that cozy with any of them
⤷ ynsmymama i vote early stages of dating. yn's a touchy person in nature so you know, it can be that
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yourinstagram added to her IG story!
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a/n: do you want to see more of them?
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part 2
#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen social media au#max verstappen one shot#max verstappen x singer!reader#max verstappen fic#harry styles x reader#harry styles x ex!reader
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he lives in you
Characters: Leona, Floyd, Jamil, Lilia
Synopsis: You shared a night of passion with your lover before you left for the other side of the mirror, but fate's cruel hands strike once again as you realise you have to raise his child alone in your original world. Thankfully, your child is incredibly drawn to magic, and they opened a portal...?
Tags: slight angst, fluffy end because im a sap, fem reader, reader gives birth to a child, reunions, bot proofread
Word count: 2.4k+
Notes: uh i was practicing Japanese and researching Japanese names before writing this, so all my name ideas ended up in japanese? if it makes you uncomfortable, you can imagine that reader is japanese hehe
right in time for mother's day, so here's to a celebration of the motherly figures in our lives, blood related or not, for being there for us<3
Part 2��Part 3✧Part 4✧Masterlist
A few months passed as you settled back into your routine at home. Eventually, with the noticeable changes in your body, it dawned on you that you were with child—his child, your lover from the other side of the mirror whom you could no longer reach.
Days turned into weeks, and weeks turn into months. You had adapted to the trials and tribulations of parenthood. Juggling the responsibilities of work, childcare, and household chores was no easy feat, but you found solace in the small moments of your child's growth and development.
Your child was a true joy to behold, a mirror image of their father in many ways, and you often see the ghost of your past lover in them. Having inherited his magic, your child experimented with their powers, leaving you to support them with what limited knowledge of magic that remained from your NRC days.
On one such experiment, your environment started to shift as a wave of magical energy engulfed you. When you opened your eyes again, he was there, right in front of you—
Hina (日来) with 日 meaning "sun, day" and 来 meaning "coming, future"
Leona reminded you of a shining sun that radiated warmth and light in your life, of how the it would surely shine again no matter how dark the night seemed, and so you named your daughter after that image
your daughter has the clearest emerald eyes and flowing dark brown locks that you often braided in a similar style to her father's
she's very energetic, always curious and asking questions, eager to learn more about the world around her
she's an obedient child, although she's eager to seek your affection and may whine a bit when things don't go her way
if there was one thing that was similar to the Leona you knew, it's that she's extremely clingy and constantly seeks physical affection, hugging your legs and asking for you to carry them any chance she has
and also the fact that she enjoyed her naps a bit too much
her lion ears are a bit of an issue in our world, but you often hide them with hoods, clever hair styling, or simply saying it's a costume
when you told her about the brilliant man her father is, she grew really excited about the possibility of meeting him, and started playing around with magic more to be like the intelligent mage he is
and then it happened, just an ordinary afternoon practicing magic had the two of you transported back to twisted wonderland, face to face to Leona
somehow, he had grown even more handsome in the years you hadn't seen him, but instead of his lazy smile, he looked confident and powerful, like the leader he was always meant to be
A sudden gust of magic swept through the air behind him as he raised his staff in response, only to immediately drop it in shock as your figure came into sight, and beside you, a small child that he had never seen before.
"Herbivore..." he whispered.
Without a second thought, Leona rushed towards you, his heart beating wildly in his chest. He felt a lump forming in his throat as he reached out to embrace you tightly.
"This better not be a dream," he murmured into the crook of your neck as he inhaled your scent. "It's really you."
after a tearful reunion and introduction, Leona quickly excuses himself from his duties with a quick meeting with Falena, and helps you and Hina settle into the palace
since you left, Leona's been working hard to do what he can do as per your promise with him
he's now in charge of foreign affairs and on better terms with his brother after much needed communication
he showers you in affection, he's even clingier than before that it almost starts a rivalry with your daughter
he puts in a lot of effort to spend time with Hina, learning her likes and dislikes and bonding over magic
uncle jack and ruggie are always fun to be around and play with her
though it wasn't his fault, leona feels guilty you had to bare the responsibility on your own for so long, and he puts in a lot of effort to make amends for any mistakes work to build a strong relationship with you two
he has a family now, and you're damn sure he'll protect it with his life
Leona looked down at Hina, feeling a sense of pride and wonder at the little girl standing before him. "Hey there," he said, his voice gentle. "Nice to meet ya, kiddo."
Hina stared at him, her eyes searching his face. "Are you my dad?" she asked, her voice small and uncertain.
Leona's heart ached at the question, knowing that he had missed so much of her life. "Yeah, I'm your dad," he said, reaching out to take her hand.
Hina looked at him for a moment before a smile spread across her face. "Can you show me magic?" she asked, her eyes lighting up with excitement.
Leona felt a sense of joy at her words, feeling a connection with her that he had never felt before. "Of course I can," he said, standing up and taking her hand. "What do you wanna see?"
Sakura (桜) meaning "cherry blossoms"
your daughter has sleek teal hair that reminds you of the sea, a single strand of dark hair, and mismatched eyes in the same manner as Floyd
Floyd had lovingly given you the nickname "Shrimpy", and it only felt right for your daughter to be named Sakura, after the tiny sakura-shrimp
she's incredibly mischievous and there's not a moment of silence with her, she's spontaneous and playful and you've got your hands full
though she is very considerate of you and will listen to your words, she's uncontrollable when she's bored and in need of a spark of interest
she's also a squeezer, much like her father, and hugs you every time she sees you or anyone she likes, and you're thankful her strength hasn't developed too much yet
she enjoys biting you, albeit gently, and you find your arms littered with bite marks, but it's her unique way of showing affection
her eel form won't show unless she's been in the water for too long (thankfully), and she enjoys squeezing you in her eel form even more
ever so curious, she's asked about her father many times, and you've told her how carefree and easygoing her father is, and that he'd love her the moment she saw her
which leads you to her magic actually teleporting you to him, her spontaneous idea having manifested itself, and you found in a dimly lit room similar to the Mostro Lounge
Floyd looked matured, his hair sleeked back and his features sharpened, though his wry smile that you loved had stayed the same
Floyd's eyes widened with shock and disbelief, and his steps quickened as he rushes towards you, his long arms outstretched in a gesture of longing. As he got closer, he noticed the beautiful and curious-looking child standing close to you.
"Shrimpy?" he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "No way... It's really you!"
Floyd pulled you close, holding you tightly as if he never wanted to let go. "I missed ya so much, I wish I hadn't let ya go," he said, his voice choked with emotion as tears threatened to spill. "You're not allowed to leave again, okay?"
Floyd is so ecstatic he can't stand still, once he's calmed down a bit, be immediately carries Sakura and drags you to Jade and Azul
Azul and Jade are pleasantly surprised at your return, and it's a warm welcome back
the two of them are glad Floyd won't be moping any time soon
the trio have now expanded into a franchise and divulged into many businesses, though Floyd largely acts as Azul's right-hand man
Now that you're back, he refuses to be apart from you, always holding onto you tightly and afraid you might disappear just like how suddenly you appeared
he does get mood swings where he's upset or angry, not at you though, just at how unfair things were and how he couldn't be there for you
he's a good eel who does everything to make sure you and Sakura are happy and comfortable, often cooking meals for you two
he's so curious about Sakura and enjoys playing with her and lifting her high up in the air
don't worry, he's extremely careful, this precious gem is why you got back to him!
Jade is the best uncle and Sakura wants to marry him??? (honestly same)
poor Azul is getting pranked by the daughter- father duo, though Sakura does comfort him afterwards with squeezes and kissss
Floyd looked down at Sakura, and he saw her staring back at him with wide, curious eyes in the opposite colours of his eyes. Though she resembled him physically, there was an air about her that was so distinctly his Shrimpy.
"Heya," Floyd said, trying to sound friendly. "I'm your dad."
Sakura giggled and reached out to him, her tiny hands grasping at his hands. Floyd froze, not sure what to do, letting her yand his hand forward. But then, she opened her mouth and bit down on finger.
"Hey!" Floyd cried, pulling back in surprise.
Sakura just laughed, her eyes sparkling with mischief. Floyd couldn't help but laugh too, despite the pain in his finger.
"Yer a feisty one, aren't ya, Sakura-shrimpy?" he teased, grinning down at her as he ruffled her hair. "You know," he whispered, "you can't just go around biting people like that. But I like your style."
Isami (功己) 功 meaning "achievement, credit, honour, merits" and 己 meaning "self, serpent, snake."
your son has smooth ebony locks and sharp grey eyes that make him look slightly intimidating
Jamil had shown you how much he valued his achievements over his social status, so you chose a name the could embody him
he's a quiet child who's always attentive and careful
he's rather shy in front of other people, but when it's you he'll soak up all of your affection and stare at you with longing eyes seeking praise
he's a cute helper at home too! he always volunteers to help you with chores and cook in the kitchen, though you're careful he's not close to anything sharp or dangerous
he does have an inherent fear of bugs, something he's inherited from Jamil, but thankfully you've taught him to be less destructive than his father
do expect screams and for him to be crying as a little fly chases him around though
he's incredibly smart and talented at magic, easily grasping the concepts of magic you can only teach him theoretically
when you told him about his father, you've told him about the diligent man that his father is, and how would let his guard down around those he treasured
he had listened quietly without much of a change in his expression, but you could tell there was a bubbling excitement building up in his eyes
and no long after that, he managed to teleport the two of you to a warm, airy room of marble walls
Jamil's features had sharpened, he seemed more openly confident and comfortable with himself
Jamil's heart skipped a beat as he saw you. It had been five years since he bid your farewell at the mirror chamber and lost you forever. And yet here you were standing here in front of him with a child in tow, a child who resembled him so much.
"It can't be..." he murmurs.
Without hesitation, Jamil dropped all the papers and rushed towards you, his heart pounding furiously. His eyes locked with yours, and in that moment, time seemed to stand still. He could see the love and longing still shining in your eyes, and he knew deep down that he had never stopped loving you.
Jamil couldn't stop the tears that began streaming down his face. "I've missed you so much," he said, his voice raspy. "Letting you go is the worst decision I've ever made." He reached out and pulling you into a tight embrace, his arms shaking with emotions.
he's a bit overwhelmed but still so thankful you're back in his life
Kalim barges in at this time and exclaims in surprise at your return and ??? OMG JAMIL YOU HAVE A SON?!!
Jamil has half a mind to dissuade him from holding a banquet immediately to welcome you back, and instead take things slow to not overwhelm you or Isami
asks Kalim for some privacy and the second he's away, he melts into your embrace
he hasn't felt so at ease in so long
if he wakes up in the morning and you're not right there beside him, he's panicking and searching all over the place for some confirmation you're still here
he's very curious about Isami and asks him all sorts of questions to piece together his development and personality
they definitely have a rivalry over who's braver over bugs but it just ends up with the two hugging you for safety
he's a bit awkward with how careful he is with his emotions, so it takes Isami some time to fully trust him
but trust me, Jamil will go above and beyond for his family and there's no way Isami will have to endure what Jamil did in his childhood
Jamil's eyes widened in surprise and wonder. He couldn't believe that they had created a life together. He knelt down to the Isami' eye level and looked into his eyes. "Hello there," he said, his voice gentle and warm. "What's your name?"
Isami starred back at him, his eyes wide with distrust and caution before he buried his face in your legs. Jamil chuckled softly. "It's okay," he comforted. "You don't have to be shy around me. I'm your dad."
Isami looked up at him again, this time with a mix of curiosity and wonder. "Daddy?" they said, testing the word out.
Jamil smiled warmly as nodded, his heart swelling with love and joy. "Yes, daddy," he parroted. "And I promise I'm never going to leave you or your mommy again."
Yuri (百合) meaning "lily"
Lilia's name always reminded you for lily flowers, and what better name for your daughter to embody him?
your daughter has straight raven hair with some of the hair flipping upwards resembling two horns, angular fae ears, and bright crimson eyes
she's always up for pranks and mischief, it's rare to see her without a smile
she loves exploring places, if you keep your eyes off her for one second, she's letting her curiosity take her to whatever she wants
if you're serious and stern though, she will listen to you, she wouldn't dare make her mother upset!
she's friendly with everyone and isn't shy to say hi to neighbors or absolute strangers
she's not overly affectionate, but she definitely enjoys hugs and kisses from you
she has an odd habit of taking stray animals back home in an attempt to adopt them, so you have little adventures with her trying to find an owner
do not let her in the kitchen
she has surely inherited her father's cooking abilities, somehow, she can render even a piece of toast beyond human consumption
magic comes as second nature to her, and she's always standing on ceilings
gosh her eyes absolutely sparkled when you told her about the teasing and mischievous fae that is her father
and soon, the portal opened and you found yourself in a gothic castle lit up by green candles
He's a lot taller, his hair longer and reaching his waist, and more enchanting than ever
Lilia stood in shock as your family figure come into sight. In all his years of living, he had never been so utterly stunned. After all these years, you had finally returned to him.
"Beastie..." Lilia gasped, his voice catching in his throat.
With a surge of energy, Lilia broke free from the trance-like state and hurried towards you, his hair streaming behind him like a dark flag as he enveloped you tightly in his embrace. "After all these years, you've truly come back to me?"
Carefully, Lilia held you at arm's length, studying your matured features, etching them into his memory like a cherished work of art. His eyes traced the lines and contours of your face, memorizing every detail that time had etched upon you.
"My, how you've grown," Lilia murmured, a mix of pride and wistfulness coloring his words. "The years have shaped you into a remarkable individual."
it's family reunion time!!!
he immediately drags you to the throne room where malleus, silver and sebek are
malleus is now king with two incredibly reliable bodyguards, and Lilia's his most trusted advisor
malleus is so glad his dear human friend is back, silver is satisfied that his father will have someone to be with, and sebek is screaming about Yuri, though she enjoys his loudness
for a while, Lilia is extremely affectionate, trying to make up for all the years that had gone by
when you're sleeping together at night, he hugs you tightly and it's difficult to leave his embrace
he definitely tries to cook for you two, going on and on about how the two of you need to stay healthy and need lots of nutrients
you always volunteer your portion for Yuri, and she'll gladly eat whatever her father has cooked for her
silver is an older brother often on babysitting duty, and Yuri loves watching him spar with sebek and also wants to learn
Sebek is quite fond of Yuri, and he sees his half-fae self in her
Lilia is always trying to fun with Yuri, bouncing her high up in the air and teaching her to hang upside down and swing around
plans so many family vacations, he can't wait to be exploring places with his two darlings
"Is she... ours?" Lilia asked. At your nod, he reached out to caress Yuri's cheek, his touch gentle as if he were touching fragile porcelain.
"Well, I'll be damned," Lilia chuckled, his voice cracking with emotion. "I never thought I'd be a father again. But I'm glad to meet you, little one. What's your name?"
Yuri giggled and and beamed at his touch. "My name's Yuri," she said, her voice sweet as honey.
"Yuri," Lilia repeated, his heart swelling with emotion. "What a beautiful name for my beautiful girl," he reached up to fondle her hair. "You know, Yuri," Lilia said, his voice growing serious. "I may not have been there for you when you were born, but I promise I'll always be here for you from now on. No matter what happens, I'm your father, and I'll always love you darling."
Part 2✧Part 3✧Part 4✧Masterlist
if you liked this post, don't forget to reblog!
#twstnexus#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#disney twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland leona#leona kingscholar x reader#leona kingsholar#twisted wonderland floyd#floyd leech x reader#floyd leech#twisted wonderland jamil#jamil viper#jamil viper x reader#twisted wonderland lilia#lilia vanrouge#lilia vanrouge x reader
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𝟷.𝟼𝚔 || 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐍 (PART 4)
♡ ︎ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: After being the forgotten one your whole life, you thought that they wouldn't forget you.
♡ ︎ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: None
♡ ︎ꜱʜɪᴘ: poly!marauders x reader
♡ ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ : part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4
It had been a few weeks since the fallout between you and the Marauders, and though you’d forgiven Remus, you were still waiting on the others to grovel appropriately. Remus had apologized sincerely, and after some much-needed cuddling, you had let it slide. But the rest of the boys? Not so much.
Today, you and Remus were curled up on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, enjoying a quiet moment together when the door to the common room burst open. James, Sirius, and Peter stumbled in, laughing about some prank they'd pulled earlier in the day.
They stopped dead in their tracks when they saw you and Remus snuggled up. Their eyes narrowed suspiciously as they took in the scene.
"Everything alright between you two?" James asked, his voice laced with curiosity, while Sirius crossed his arms, clearly trying to read the room.
You raised an eyebrow at them, already irritated at the question. "Why wouldn’t it be?"
"Well, you know," Sirius drawled, glancing sideways at James, "since Remus is… Remus. And everything." He tried to sound casual, but you could tell he was fishing.
You crossed your arms, glaring at them. "Oh, now you care to talk about it?"
James blinked. "About what?"
Remus sighed beside you, knowing exactly where this was headed. The rest of the boys exchanged confused glances, still pretending they didn’t know what you were talking about.
"Don't play dumb," you said, sitting up and fixing each of them with an annoyed look. "The fact that none of you thought it necessary to tell me that Remus is a werewolf."
Sirius’s face went slack for a second before he tried to recover. "What?! Remus? A werewolf?" He threw his hands up dramatically. "I had no idea—"
Peter asked, confused, "How'd you figur-"
"Oh, please," you snapped, cutting him off. "With all those very visible scars, the four of you disappearing every full moon, and let’s not forget the howling coming from the Shrieking Shack. Do I look like an idiot to you?"
James bit back a laugh while Peter’s eyes widened in panic.
"And the final clue?" you continued, glaring at each of them. "All of you standing me up on our date the day after the full moon. Even Snape could figure it out!"
The mention of Snape's name made them all freeze. You noticed the exchange of guilty glances between them.
“Wait,” you said, gasping as realization hit. “Snape knew?”
They were all dead silent.
You turned to Remus, narrowing your eyes. "Well, congratulations, Lupin. You're officially back on the list."
Remus groaned dramatically. “Not the list.”
The other three burst into laughter, relieved to hear Remus wasn’t fully off the hook either.
"Alright," James said, stepping forward with a cheeky grin. "What’s it gonna take to get off this list?"
You smirked, finally ready to dole out some consequences. "Remus will be doing all of my assignments for the next six months. Except during the full moon, of course.”
Remus let out a breath of relief. "That's not so bad—"
You cut him off with a wicked smile. "I'm not finished. You’ll also be partnering with Lucius Malfoy in Charms class.”
Remus’s eyes widened in horror. “Nooooo! Anyone but Malfoy!”
You ignored his whining and turned to James, who was now grinning as if he’d already won your forgiveness.
"And Jamie here," you said sweetly, reaching out to pinch his cheek, "is going to switch partners with me in Defense Against the Dark Arts."
"That’s alright,” James shrugged, clearly thinking he got off easy. "I can handle that."
You smirked. “Then I’ll have Lily, and you’ll have Snape.”
James’s face fell instantly. “W-wait, hold on. You can’t—”
You cut him off with a grin. “Too late. It’s decided.”
James groaned dramatically, flopping onto the nearest couch as if the world had ended.
Next, you turned to Sirius, who was already bracing himself.
“And Sirius,” you said, drawing out his name, “you’ll be spending every evening studying with me in the library. And we both know how much you hate studying.”
Sirius groaned loudly, but you weren’t done.
"Oh, and one more thing," you added with a smirk. "No sex for one month."
His jaw dropped in horror. "NOOOOOOO!"
James burst out laughing, while Remus patted Sirius on the back sympathetically.
Finally, you turned to Peter, who looked the most nervous of them all. "Pete," you said softly, "I really didn’t want to do this, but you’re going to have to give up sweets and candies for an entire month."
Peter gasped in absolute horror, clutching the chocolate bar he was holding as if his life depended on it. You reached out, gently plucking it from his hand.
"Sorry, Pete. It’s the rules."
Peter fell to his knees, dramatically crying out, “Not my sweets! Anything but my sweets!”
You couldn’t help but chuckle at the theatrics. The boys were always a handful, but at least now they were going to work to earn their way back into your good graces.
"Don’t worry," you said with a smirk. "I’m sure you’ll all manage… eventually."
They groaned collectively, each already dreading the next few weeks.
But you had to admit, watching them squirm like this? Absolutely worth it.
thank you so much @pandainfinitely for the idea to write the grovelling part!!
#james potter x reader#james potter#sirius black x reader#sirius black#fluff#james fleamont potter#remus lupin x reader#james potter fluff#sirius black fluff#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin#sirius orion black#peter pettigrew fluff#peter pettigrew x reader#peter pettigrew
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HEY! YOU!
You've probably heard by now, but from March 4th to 10th 2024, Help Gaza Children will be sending all their donations to families in northern Gaza, where food prices have skyrocketed even more than in the south. Their goal is $25K by the end of the week; at the time of writing this post, it's about halfway a quarter way there! (OG post about it) [EDIT: my mistake, I misinterpreted the numbers in the original post; evidently I cannot do arithmetic anymore]
This is their notion site, which has their donation link as well as additional info, their FAQ, important updates, and proof of purchases from donations they’ve gotten in the past. You can also donate directly to their paypal here.
As such, I'll be open for sketch commissions up from now (March 7th, 2024 ~02:20 PST) through March 10th in exchange for proof of donation to Help Gaza Children!
BASIC OVERVIEW:
Tier 1 - Basic head/bust sketch for $1-5 USD, +50% for basic color. Up to 3 characters.
Tier 2 - Basic screencap resketch for $5-15 USD, +50% for basic color.
Tier 3 - Posed sketch for $15-25 USD, 1-2 characters ONLY.
Tier 4 - Colored clean sketch: $25+ USD, 1-2 characters ONLY.
RULES:
Please provide a visual reference or detailed description of the character(s) you want drawn (and depending on the tier, a screencap or pose/expression you want to go with it)
DO'S: OCs, humans and human-like creatures, other creatures that don't have a lot of mechanical or anatomical detail (as in, I can TRY to do mecha stuff, but I think you and I will both be better of if I don't lol; can ask for further details)
DON'T'S: any NSFW stuff, real people currently alive (as in, historical figures in the setting of historical fiction may be okay, but other things may not be; can ask for further details)
If you've made your donation in a currency that is not USD, I'll give you something of equivalent value according to the tier based on whatever the conversion is at the time that I look it up. If one or both of our economies crashes spectacularly in between the time you send it and the time I look it up, I'm very sorry in advance
DISCLAIMER 1: I reserve the right to decline a commission for any reason; however, if this ends up being the case, I may reach out to you to see if we can come up with a middle ground that suits us both.
DISCLAIMER 2: I don't anticipate being able to do a lot of these, as I've got a full-time job that's in the ballpark ~80+ hours a week with really weird hours. That being said, depending on how far this goes, turnaround time will probably be ~2-3 months, give or take...something. I'll update you monthly until it's done.
FOR PERSONAL, NON-COMMERCIAL USE ONLY!
If you're interested in nabbing a sketch from me in exchange for your donation, email a screenshot (devoid of any personal info please) of your donation receipt and details of your sketch request (e.g. reference, tier, etc.) to [email protected]. For your donation to count for a sketch, it must be made after I wrote this post! (March 7, 2024 ~02:20 A.M. PST)
If you are NOT interested in nabbing a sketch from me, feel free to donate anyway!!
(And if you've got any questions about anything feel free to email, DM, or send an ask!)
#palestine#gaza#helpgazachildren#orv#undertale#commissions#donations#if this inspires even one extra person to donate that wouldn't otherwise have known about it I'll consider that a win#anyways I don't really expect this to go very far outside my circle if at all#so I'd appreciate some help in spreading the word#especially about the main fundraiser#these drawings are really secondary to the whole thing#but if you want to donate AND help a sad partially-art-blocked artist get unblocked! here is your opportunity!#if this goes somewhere I might do it again with other links#otherwise I'll just keep donating privately
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✨Dress Up, Part 2: The Ceremony✨
Well well well, looks like you guys won. You get a continuation of this fic that was meant to be a one shot lmao! I had some awesome people to bounce ideas off of and I couldn't do this without them. I hope you enjoy this chapter, it's time for the wedding! But you know I can't go a chapter without writing a little smut hehe~
*** - Scene change ~~~ - Flashback
Part 1, Part 3, Part 4
Lucifer x f!sinner reader
Summary: It's wedding day! And Lucifer is more than willing to try and convince you to the leave the reception early...
Warnings: 18+, smut, hand job, oral (m receiving)
"You know, if you don't quit your pacing back and forth, you're gonna wear out the carpet..."
***
It had only been a week since the proposal and the wedding was already here. But this is what you both wanted; a nice quiet wedding with only a handful of people with everyone else in Hell being none the wiser. You had to beg Lucifer for the week you got in between, he was practically ready to say "I do" once he put that engagement ring on your hand. It may have seemed like you two were moving a little bit fast considering most weddings take months, sometimes years to plan out! But when you're marrying the King of Hell, there really was next to nothing to worry about when it came to your special day.
The new hotel was the perfect venue, complete with a beautiful ballroom that could rival any chapel on Earth. The guest list was extremely exclusive consisting of only the occupants of the hotel, minus one Radio Demon, not that he would attend even if he was invited. It was Charlie who suggested that he protect the hotel today from any threat that might make itself known. On top of that, Charlie was more than happy to be the officiant, as being the Princess of Hell granted her that authority. Money was no object to the Morningstar family, so no expense was spared.
But regardless of any of that, Lucifer couldn't help but worry. You had one other request for him after he popped the question.
~~~
"I hate to ask more of you after asking for a week to prepare," you started, putting on the last of your clothes that you had discarded during your fun little teasing display, "but..." Lucifer approached you suddenly and held your hand in both of his.
"My love, you can ask of me anything you wish. There is no limit when it comes to you. You've already given me the best gift of becoming my future bride. Anything in my power is yours for the asking, you just name it!" He leaned down and planted a small kiss on the back of your hand. You couldn't help but blush, he never failed to charm you.
"This may sound a little odd, considering what just took place a few minutes ago," you breathed out a sigh, "but...what would you say to refraining from any...intense intimacy?" Lucifer cocked his eyebrow and smirked, seemingly intrigued. "B-but only for this week, I promise! Kissing and cuddling would still be on the table, of course. And no deliberate teasing from me, that wouldn't be fair. I was just thinking that...I want our first night as a married couple to be special. And I figured holding off for the time in between would only heighten the experience. If that's not something you want, I completely understand that-MMPH," you were silenced by Lucifer's soft lips on yours.
"Oh darling, was that all?," he flashed his signature toothy grin at you. "That's hardly a request! I think that's a wonderful idea...n-not that I don't want to ravish you at any given time! But you're right, I couldn't imagine a better honeymoon than getting the chance to feel you again after being denied for a few days, even though it may feel like an eternity. I'll be on my best behavior; you have my word!"
~~~
And Lucifer was on his best behavior, for the most part, at least. There were a few instances where his hands had traveled a little too low on your body and some kisses became deeper than they should have. But both of you managed to make it through the week! But today was the day, and his anxiety was at an all-time high. You decided to sleep in separates rooms the night before, wanting the next time you saw each other to be at the altar. That was the plan, at least.
It had been a while since Lucifer had slept alone. Suffice to say he couldn't sleep. He assured you that he would be alright sleeping alone for just one night, but that ended up being easier said than done. The empty bed he laid in brought back painful memories of his first night without Lilith, something that still haunted him to this day. There would be times where Lucifer would wake up in a cold sweat, only to glance over to see you peacefully asleep, and he could breathe again. Anytime you felt him tug you closer to him in the middle of the night, you knew what had woken him up. He never hid his feelings from you when he confided in you about his ex, and you didn't mind that he would wake you when his nightmares overwhelmed him. You loved him and he loved you. You would never leave. So when you heard your door creek open in the middle of the night to see your fiancé standing ion the door frame, you only smiled and gestured him to you.
~~~
"I-I'm sorry," he sobbed quietly, "I tried...I really did...I-I had a dream, a nightmare, you were there but you started to fade away in front of me. I reached out but it was no use. I woke up and…and you weren’t there, I panicked…I’m so s-sorry…”
"Hey, hey, shh, it's alright," you soothed and brought him into a tight embrace. You felt a tear that had fallen from his face make its way down your collarbone. "Don't cry, Luci, I'm not upset, not at all." You lifted his head up to wipe away his remaining tears. "Let's get some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow." You planted a kiss on his forehead, and from the dim red light that shown through your windows, you could see a small smile appear on his face. He laid down, his back facing you as you wrapped your arms around him and brought him flush to your chest. You could hear his breathing start to even about again.
"I don't deserve you," he murmured.
"You know I think the same thing every day," you respond.
He interlaced his fingers with yours at your words, squeezing you hand softly. "Promise me you'll never think that again. Please. You deserve everything and more."
"Alright," you conceded, kissing the back of his head, "as long as you promise me the same thing. You're my everything, and I'll spend the rest of my afterlife showing you that."
"Okay," he spoke weakly. You intertwined your legs with his, bringing yourself as close to him as possible. "I still intend to keep my other promise. I'll be gone before you wake up."
"You can stay as long as you need to," you whispered before drifting off to sleep once more.
~~~
True to his word, Lucifer had managed to sneak away before you woke. After adorning his typical attire, he found himself wandering the halls of the hotel, finally stopping when he reached the lobby. Thinking he was alone, Lucifer started talking to himself and paced back and forth like a madman.
"Was this a mistake? Are we moving too fast? No, no, no it's alright, it's fine! We're fine! Get a fucking GRIP, Lucifer! You're panicking for nothing! She loves you...right? Yes, yes of course she does! Why would she say yes to you?! Unless...NO! No, none of that! Relax! Need to relax..."
"You know, if you don't quit your pacing back and forth, you're gonna wear out the carpet," Husk remarked, attempting to get Lucifer's attention in his anxious state.
"WHAT THE-" Lucifer shrieked hearing the bartender's voice. After seeing Husk standing behind the bar, he breathed out a sigh of relief and clutched his hand to his rapidly beating heart. "Geez, warn a guy next time!" Husk huffed and returned to cleaning the whiskey glass he held in his hand. "How, uhh, how much of that did you hear?"
"Enough to know that you're a fucking mess right now," the cat demon replied, setting down his now clean glass. "Perhaps you need a bartender to talk to."
"Uhh, alright?" Lucifer made his way over to the bar and took a tentative seat on one of the stools.
"This is about your girl, ain't it?" Husk correctly guessed, "about the wedding?" Lucifer sighed and nodded. "Mhmm. You love this gal, don't you?"
"Yes, of course I do!" Lucifer answered almost defensively. "She's...my everything!"
Husk picked up another dirty glass to clean. "And has she given you any reason to doubt that she feels the same way?"
Lucifer huffed. "Well, I...no, no she hasn't. She's always been there for me. Listening to my ramblings, making me laugh, consoling me during the worst times, like last night...she's...she's just perfect!"
"So what's the holdup?" Husk asked after setting the other glass down.
"It's not as simple as you're making it out to be, Husker," Lucifer retorted, pushing his way back from the bar. "I loved Lilith with all of my heart and soul. And she said...that she loved me too. But then one day, she was just gone. Vanished. We fell together. We built a life here TOGETHER! And she just leaves? It's like the last 10,000 years together meant absolutely NOTHING!" Lucifer ran his hands through his hair, trying to keep his composure. "I-I can't lose her like like I lost Lilith. I just can't! I just want to be enough for her. I don't know what I would do if she...", he couldn't finish his sentence. He sat back down at the bar, resting his head in his arms. "The pain would break me..."
The sound of a glass sliding across the counter top caught Lucifer's attention. When he lifted his head, he noticed a full glass of scotch sitting next to him. "Calms the nerves," Husk spoke. Lucifer let out a deep breath and took a swig, choking slightly in the process not realizing how strong it was.
"Not much of a drinker," Lucifer admitted, setting the glass down.
"Sir, if I may..." Husk began.
"You can call me Lucifer," the angel smiled slightly.
Husk smirked. "Lucifer, all I can tell you that love is a vulnerable emotion. I understand that you're afraid. Afraid that history will repeat itself, that your love is not meant to be, and that you're going to end up alone all over again." Lucifer's face sunk, lowering his head against his arms once more. "But," Husk continued, "I know one thing for sure. That girl up there ain't Lilith."
Lucifer raised his head, now hanging onto every word from the bartender.
"If anybody thinks you aren't enough, that's their own fucking problem. And I can tell you that your girl ain't like that at all. She adores ya, can't get her to shut up about ya! Hell, I couldn't even tell you why she ended up down here in the first place! Another one of Heaven's fuck ups, for sure. But for your sake, I'm glad she did." Husk reached over and gulped down Lucifer's unfinished glass of scotch. "Be a shame if it went to waste."
Lucifer let out the smallest of laughs. "Thank you, Husker. And you're right, even in this God forsaken pit, she manages to make it just a little bit brighter. She saved me. And I'm going to devote every moment of my immortal life to her."
"Good to hear. Now..." Husk slammed his hand down on the counter, "get your shit together and go get ready! You got a wedding to attend."
*** You startled awake with the sound of knocking at your door. Your mind was still foggy, brief memories of last night flooded through your head. "Lucifer?" you sat up and looked around your room, but he was already gone, leaving you alone in an empty bed. He had kept his promise after all. There was another set of knocks at the door. "Coming!" you shouted as you ran to grab the robe you had left on the armchair. You opened the door to see Charlie bouncing giddily.
“Good moooorrrrnnniiiinnnngggggg~” she practically sang. “Did you sleep well? Are you ready for your big day?? Are we forgetting anything???” She rapid fired questions at you while you were still rubbing the crust from your eyes.
“Charlie, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you’re more excited than I am,” you joked, gesturing her to come in. “In order: Yes, I slept…well. Yes, I’m ready...mentally speaking. And no, we’re definitely not forgetting anything. You’re the most meticulous and thoughtful person I know, you definitely have everything planned to a tee! You practically leapt out of your skin when we asked if you would officiate.”
"Aww, thank you!" Charlie smiled as she skipped into your room. "And of course! I would never turn down such an opportunity! Being the princess of Hell does have its perks! You can never be too prepared, ya know? Especially for a day that's so wonderful and magical and full of love!" You saw tears welling up in her eyes out of pure joy.
"Hey now, I thought I was the one that was supposed to be crying today!" you joked.
"Right, right! Sorry!" She wiped the tears from her eyes and grabbed your hands excitedly. "Let's get your hair and make up done!"
Charlie dragged you over to the vanity and sat you down in the chair. You weren't one to wear much makeup typically, but Charlie insisted. And when Charlie asks for something, it's pretty much impossible to tell her no. So you obliged. But you made her promise that she would not go overboard, only the basics. Thankfully you showered the night before, so your hair just needed a good brush through. Charlie grabbed the hairbrush and began to comb through your hair, gently pulling out the knots out of the nasty case of bed head you were sporting. She truly was the kindest soul you've ever met. But that didn't stop you from feeling a little awkward.
"Charlie," you mumbled, "can I-oww...can I ask you something?"
"Yes, absolutely!" She grabbed the the already plugged-in curler and started working on adding some volume to your hair.
"Are...are you sure you're alright with this?" you asked timidly. "I mean...me and your father. I just don't want you to think I'm trying to, you know...replace your mother. I know I don't know much about her or your relationship but..."
Charlie put down the curler and kneeled down next to you, gently grabbing your hand. "You don't need to worry about that! I promise, it's alright with me. It's more than alright, actually! I haven't seen my dad this happy in a long, long time. He loves you so much! You wanna know how I know that? Because he tells me. Every single day. His eyes light up when anybody mentions your name! And I know you would never do anything to hurt him, or me. You're too kind and good hearted for that. I know it may feel like you're inserting yourself into the picture, but I'm more than happy to have you as part of our family! I know the love you have for my dad is genuine, and I wouldn't change a thing!"
A smile formed on your face. "Thank you, Charlie."
"Now," Charlie hopped up from the floor and grabbed the large make up bag sitting on the counter, “time to make magic happen! I have the perfect idea! Close your eyes and no peaking until I say so!”
*** You could feel your heart beating out of your chest as you stood in front of the closed ballroom doors. You knew just on the other side of that door was the love of your life, and he was waiting for you. Husk linked your arm with his, flashing you a warm smile. "You ready?"
You let out a few shaky breaths before you could answer him. "Y-yes."
"Don't worry, I gotcha," he comforted, "one step at a time, alright? Trust me, whatever you're feeling now, he was in much worse shape this morning. Nearly had to kick his ass to the altar myself. But I straightened him out for ya."
You could help but laugh. "Thanks, Husk. And thank you for walking me down. I know this isn't really a traditional wedding, but I appreciate everything you and everyone else have done for us."
"No thanks is necessary," Husk replied, "for what you do for Charlie and the hotel, it's the least I can do. You're a good one to be sure. And the King is damn lucky to have ya." You smiled and tightened your grip on Husk's arm as you heard the faint sound of music start to play on the other side. "It's time."
Without another word, the large wooden doors opened in front of you, and the music could be heard much more clearly now. The Bridal Chorus. Husk waited on your command as you took the first step. You scanned the room. You saw Vaggie and Cherri standing to one side, Angel off to the other, while Niffty skipped in front of you throwing a mix of flower petals and roaches. You noticed Charlie straight ahead of you in a lovely blue suit, a color you've never seen her wear before. You also took notice to the fact there didn't seem to be any organ in the room, despite the music that continued to play as you walked. You guessed it was some of Lucifer's magic. He really knew how to set the scene for the occasion.
Finally, your eyes found Lucifer. He looked at you as if you were the most angelic being he's ever laid his eyes on. You couldn't quite make out the details of his face yet, but you could tell that tears had begun rolling down his face. You saw his suit for the first time. A beautiful black velvet suit with embroidered gold detailing on the jacket. He looked like royalty.
Lucifer stared back at you, fighting every urge in his body to run to you and scoop you up in his arms. Your dress was immaculate. A stunning flowing sleeveless white dress adorned with fluffy scarlet feathers that were scattered across the skirt and completely covered the bodice. An homage to your future husband. You were only a few feet from him now. His smile could have lit the darkest of rooms. The tears continued to flow from his eyes, and you could feel tears threatening to leave yours as well.
"Deep breaths," Husk murmured to you before stepping to the side to join Angel. You inhaled deeply, holding your breath until you stood directly in front of Lucifer, only exhaling when he reached out and held your hands in his.
The music stopped. Your heartbeat was the only thing you could hear now.
Charlie cleared her throat. "Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today to join these two souls before us in holy matrimony. I understand that the couple have written their own vows." Charlie glanced your way and beamed. "Ladies first!" You smiled back at her then turned your full attention to Lucifer, staring lovingly and longingly into his eyes. You had spent the entire week practicing and memorizing your words for this very moment. You breathed in, and you breathed out.
"Lucifer, words cannot begin to describe how you make me feel. You have shown me so much compassion, understanding, care, and adoration that I had never experienced on Earth. My promise to you is that I will always stay by your side, I will never abandon you, and I will love you for the rest of my after life. You've changed my life for the better, and I will make sure that I do the same for you. You are my one true love, forever and always. I love you, my angel."
Lucifer pulled one of his hands away to wipe away the tears the refused to stop flowing. Angel pulled out a handkerchief and brought it over to him and began patting it across his cheeks. You looked at Charlie who had also started to cry. She quickly composed herself and turned towards her father. "D-Dad?" she squeaked out.
Once Lucifer was able to compose himself, he took hold of your hands once more. "My love, I have existed since before the dawn of creation. And in my thousands of years of existence, no one has brought me as much joy as you have. You came into my life suddenly, like a thief in the night, and stole my most precious possession. My heart. It is yours now, for eternity and even beyond. I promise that you will never know another day of sadness, of heartbreak, or of loneliness. My devotion to you is boundless and unfathomable and never ending. I am yours. I love you, my queen."
Razzle appeared in front of the two of you, displaying the silver wedding rings for each of you. You and Lucifer took your respective ring to to place on the other's hand.
"Lucifer," Charlie spoke through her sniffles "will you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife; will you love, honor, and cherish her, hold her up in the good times and the bad, for as long as you both shall live?"
"I do, forever," he answered, sliding the ring onto your finger.
Charlie turned and repeated the question to you.
"Yes, I do," you proclaimed, sliding the ring onto his hand in the same manner.
"By the power vested in me, as princess of Hell, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."
You and Lucifer smiled at each other, no longer able to hold back any of your tears. Lucifer cupped your face and brought your lips to his for a tender kiss. You heard the cheers from the others in the room, and you definitely heard Angel whistle as your lips connected. When you pulled apart, something had caught your eye. Your rings were glowing. Magic in the form of golden dust surrounded each of them, swirling around the metal bands.
"What's this?" You asked Lucifer, who didn't seem alarmed at all.
He chuckled. "You're the new Queen of Hell, my darling. This magic is a symbol. It signifies that you are no longer bound by the rules that govern the sinners; you are bound to me. You have free reign to travel anywhere you wish, including the other rings of Hell. You're now one of the most powerful beings in the realm! But we can get into the finer details later; for now," Lucifer pecked your lips once again, "let's celebrate!"
After wiping away her excessive tears, Charlie cleared her throat. "Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce to you for the first time ever, Mr. and Mrs. Morningstar!" The crowd cheered as you walked hand in hand with your husband back down the aisle.
"Who's ready to fucking PARTY?!" Cherri yelled behind you as you all made your way towards the bar in the lobby.
Drinks poured at the reception, everyone was cutting lose and having fun! You two had decided to partake in as many traditional reception activities as you could! Neither of you knew how you ended up with so much cake all over yourselves, but it was alright considering Lucifer easily snapped his fingers and both of you ended up back in pristine condition. You invited everyone to participate in the bouquet toss, but it was Vaggie who ended up with the flowers in the end. She absolutely failed to hide her blush from Charlie who was jumping for joy! But this next tradition was something Lucifer had really been looking forward to; the garter belt toss.
Ever the showman, Lucifer hiked up your dress to your thigh and rather than using his hands, he decided to use his teeth to pull the garment down. His head lingered near your thigh way longer than necessary, and you could Angel snickering as Lucifer dragged it down the length of your leg.
"Oh, you're gonna get it," you leaned down to whisper to him, hoping no one else could hear.
"Is that a threat or a promise?" Lucifer retorted with the garter belt still between his teeth.
To no one's surprise, Angel was the one to catch the belt once Lucifer finally tossed it.
The reception was going off without a hitch. Everyone was having the time of their lives getting plastered and gorging themselves on the enormous buffet Lucifer hand conjured up. You had changed out of your wedding dress into a new purple dress; the lavender one that you really liked that you had tried on a week ago before you got yanked out of the dressing room by a certain horny angel. Thankfully, you two were able to go back to the store the next day to properly purchase it. You and Lucifer were given your own large round table so you wouldn't have to sit at the crowded bar. Luckily for Lucifer, this gave him easy access to you. As the reception went on and with no one being the wiser, Lucifer's hand found your thigh once more, gliding it up ever so slowly before you shot him a knowing glance.
"What do you say we leave early," he proposed innocently, "I have a wonderful surprise for my new bride once we're on our honeymoon."
You playfully grabbed Lucifer's wandering hand and pushed it down towards your knee. "Luci, it's only been an hour! You can't tell me you can't wait just a little longer, can you?"
Lucifer stuck out his lip and pouted sweetly. "Oh, but my love, have you forgotten? It's been an entire week! And you know how well behaved I've been, I am nothing if not a man of my word." You felt his hand begin its ascent on your leg once more. You didn't stop him. "But I can only be a gentleman for so long..."
You didn't want to admit it, but you were in the same boat as well. That week apart had been almost tortuous. But you were more than willing to wait until the party was over. Your husband, however, appeared to have a different idea.
Alright then.
Before his hand could climb any higher, your hand shot down immediately to his crotch. Lucifer bit back a yelp as he felt you palm him through his pants. His hand stopped all motion, but instead started digging into your thigh, ultimately trying to remain calm. But that task seemed nearly impossible with the way your hand continued its ministrations, his pants feeling tighter and tighter with every passing second.
"D-Darling, please..." he begged through his clenched teeth.
You grinned wickedly. "You want me to take care of you, Luci?" He nodded his head vigorously. "We're not leaving early. But, I'll help you out as a good wife should, yeah?" Lucifer panted, his nails now dangerously close to breaking through your skin. "Head to the restroom just down the hall. Give me a minute and I'll follow you. I'll knock three times to let you know it's me. I have a plan. No touching yourself, understand?"
"Y-Yes," he breathed. When he was sure no one was looking, he stood up from his chair as fast as possible before making his way down the hall. Once you saw him disappear around the corner, it was time to give yourself some cover.
"Angel!" you yelled across the room, waving your hands to flag him down. The spider demon turned his head and smiled. He said something inaudible to Cherri before making his way over to you.
"Hey there, pretty lady!" Angel bent over and folded is first pair arms on the table, "Congratulations on the new gig! Being Queen of Hell sure is a status boost!"
"Yeah, I still need time to process that," you admitted. "So Angel, can you umm, do me a favor?"
Angel stood up and slicked his hair back. "Oh, anything for the new member of the royal family! What can I do ya for, doll face?"
You let out a shaky breath. "Can you...how do I say this...cause some sort of distraction?" Angel raised an eyebrow. "I just need to take care of something real quick."
"Uh huh," Angel chuckled, "you need to take care of something? Or someone?~" You pursed your lips, a light blush dashed across your cheeks. You really should have known better than to try and tiptoe around your means of leaving with Angel. "That's what I thought. Don't think I didn't notice the King almost sprint out of here just now. Man is absolutely smitten with ya! But you'll get no judgement from me, baby, I know how it is! Consider this your wedding gift, I typically end up being the most distracting person wherever I go! How much time do you need?"
"Five minutes?"
"Oh honey, I think you're giving him way too much credit, especially considering the state he's in." Angel laughed, "I can give you three."
"Four."
"Deal," Angel stuck a hand out for you to shake. He was ready to turn away when he flashed you a wink. "Get ready!"
As soon as you heard Angel shout loud enough to grab everyone's attention, you got up from the table and followed Lucifer's path down the hall. Once you stood in front of the restroom door, you knocked on it three times just as you said you would. It took less than a second for the door to swing open and for Lucifer to pull you inside. He locked the door behind you and crashed his lips into yours. You pushed him up against the door as you slipped your tongue further into his mouth. He was devouring you as his hands gripped your hips.
"We don't have a lot of time," you said breathlessly, "we have four minutes."
"How did-HHNG," Lucifer wanted to question until you began to palm at his now very apparent erection through his pants again.
"Let's just say I owe Angel big time." You started to fumble with Lucifer's belt, pulling it off of his pants with a quick flick of your arm. Your hands worked at the button and zipper of his pants next, going almost too fast for you to properly hold anything. You gripped the hem of his pants and boxers and were about to pull them down together until Lucifer grabbed your wrists.
"Wait, wait! What about you?" he asked. Even in such a lust filled state, he still only ever thought about you. God, you really hit the jackpot.
You gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I appreciate it hon, but we really don't have the time to argue about this. Four minutes, remember? Probably closer to three now." You pulled your hands away from Lucifer's grip and went back to the hem of his pants, pulling down his boxers in the process, finally freeing his hardened cock that was already leaking precum. You placed your hands on either side of his hips, his back flush against the door. "You better tell me what you want quickly, Luci."
Lucifer gulped hard, staring at you through half-lidded eyes. "T-touch me...please...n-need you..."
Without another word, you moved to stand at Lucifer's side as your one hand gripped his shaft while the other cupped his mouth to keep him from making too much noise. "Shh, gotta be quiet, my love. You don't want the others to hear how your queen makes you feel." He nodded his head silently as you began to stroke him. You watched as precum dripped onto the floor below; it was obvious how pent up he was. You quickly picked you the pace as your hand moved up and down his cock, thumbing over the tip only for Lucifer to mewl into your hand and buck up into your touch. His breathing became more and more staggered by the second, he wasn't going to last much longer at this rate. But you knew you were running out of time and your hands alone were not going to be enough to finish the job. "Not a sound," you commanded as you released your hand from his mouth, dropping to your knees in an instant. Before Lucifer could protest, your mouth had already full engulfed his length. He threw his own hand over his mouth to muffle his screams as best he could. Your head bobbed up and down rapidly on his cock while stopping every few seconds to lap circles around his tip. He was close.
"F-Fuu-uuccckk," he whimpered, "I-I'm g-mmph...gonna c-cum...shitshitSHIT!" And almost on cue, you felt him empty himself inside you. Strings of hot cum hit that back of your throat while you continued to suck him off, helping him ride out his orgasm. Once he was finished, you let his now softened dick fall from your lips, not letting a single drop leave your mouth. You gracefully stood up and grabbed his belt that you had flung earlier and handed it to him.
"Feel better?" you whispered in his ear, sending a shiver down his spine.
He turned his head to meet your lips once more. He always loved the taste of him on your mouth. "Immeasurably," Lucifer moaned into you.
"And only with a few seconds to spare!" Lucifer buckled his pants once more while you walked over to the sink and began soaking one of the wash cloths in cool water. You dabbed the towel on his forehead, attempting to cool him down. "Can't have you looking so disheveled, my king."
"I promise to make this up to you," Lucifer swore. "You should never be left unsatisfied."
You smiled and kissed him on the forehead sweetly. "My satisfaction is knowing I'm the only one who can pull those beautiful sounds out of you." Lucifer could help but look away from you in embarrassment. "Now, if you promise to behave for the rest of the party, let's just say I have a...proposition for you later tonight. I know exactly how you can pay me back." You unlocked the bathroom door and held it open for him. "Let's not keep our guests waiting!"
~~~
IT'S SO FUCKING LATE RIGHT NOW HOLY GOD I WAS ON A ROLL I DIDN'T WANT TO STOP! I hope you guys are ready for the honeymoon ;)
Taglist: @ask-theradio-demon @kermitdafroggy @thonethatflies620 @luc1fersducky @a-okay-rj @bat-boness @myhornybrainonlyknowsthis @misfitgirlwrites @animationmovieshipps @orbitinglumps @ramenkitten @blaackbiird @bigfatbimbo @lucisaspen @bvnnyangel @seulace9 @fluffypinkpillows @starlightdreaming @k-n0-x @rosen-und-mondlicht @raindropsfromheaven @slutforlucifermorningstar (I'm sorry if I missed anyone!)
#hazbin hotel#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin lucifer#lucifer x reader#lucifer morningstar x reader#lucifer smut#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel smut#my writing#holy hell i just couldn't stop!#i think i beat my word count again haha#5100 WORDS LET'S GOOOO!!
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It’s the most ✨wonderful✨ time of year! AKA time for the annual RWRB Christmas fic exchange that I do with some friends every year. Would you believe that this is our fourth year doing this?
For the next 8 days, we’ll be posting a fic anonymously each day to the Don We Now (Even More) Gay Fanfiction collection on ao3. I’ll update this post with the links to each fic as they go up. The author reveals will be shared before New Year’s Eve ☺️
I’m so excited to see what everyone’s come up with!
Day 1: Home for the Holidays || M || 9.3k || a gift for @indomitable-love
When Alex discovers that Henry's Christmas plans involve staying in their apartment alone, he does what any good roommate would do and drags Henry along to his family Christmas at the lake house. It's a win-win situation, since everything is better for Alex when Henry is around. Henry is his person. Completely fucking platonically, of course.
Day 2: Playing For The Other Team || E || 6.1k || a gift for @three-drink-amy
Alex is the captain of his college lacrosse team. Henry captains the football team—or the soccer team, depending on who you ask. But if you think either team has their main rival within their own sport, you are very deeply wrong.
Or: two sports teams, both alike in dignity. In the Samson Memorial Stadium, where we lay our scene.
Day 3: The Thirteenth Duke || E || 10.7k || a gift for @villiageidiot
Alex is trying to find himself after his divorce, and Castle Llwynywermod seems like the perfect place to do it. Henry, the grumpy duke who owns the castle in question, strongly disagrees. This can only go well. (An 'A Castle for Christmas' movie fusion fic.)
Day 4: Ho for the Holidays || T || 6k || a gift for yours truly
It sort of starts on New Year's Eve, although maybe it's actually Valentine's Day. But probably St. Patrick's Day. Well, whenever it starts, it ends on Christmas, but for good reason. Holiday hook-ups can only stay hook-ups for so long.
Day 5: Making a List, Checking it Twice || E || 18.6k || a gift for @athousandrooms & @dustratcentral
When Alex lands a job house-sitting for an international man of mystery, he’s more than a little intrigued. According to Nora, the owner of the Brooklyn brownstone is a spy. According to June, he’s a prince. Alex is convinced his employer is a fifty-year-old man who loves tartan and ugly, porcelain homewares. Also, Alex might be flirting with his boss via a handwritten grocery list. Just a little bit.
Day 6: The Flight Before Christmas || M || 7.2k || a gift for @welcometololaland
Alex loves his job. He gets to fly all over the world and see incredible places. It satisfies his restlessness and his need to always be on the move. But sometimes, Alex hates his job. Hates the passengers. One passenger in particular. --- or Alex is a flight attendant and Henry is his most-hated passenger.
Day 7: Baby, It’s Cold Outside || E || 12.6k || a gift for @clottedcreamfudge
Alex needs this trip. He needs it. Too many months have gone by since he and Henry were in the same place. It was so easy to get used to being in the same city. He feels like a different person than who he was the last time he saw Henry. Maybe that’s just because the last term felt like an eternity. As he looks at the map on the screen, the little plane icon gets closer and closer to England. If he shuts his eyes, he can feel Henry a bit more.
Day 8: I might just give you a chance (every-which way) || M || 8.4k || a gift for @everwitch-magiks
Alex is on his holiday break, which is why he signs up to take on the bulk of helping his sister with her charity market stall. And while he does actually like the bustle and interactions with people that come with the job, he will admit only to himself that what he enjoys the most is antagonising his market nemesis, who, inexplicably with Alex’s ‘fuck you’ attitude, keeps coming around to make a daily purchase.
PS. If you're looking for more firstprince holiday fics you can find our earlier Christmas fic exchanges here: 2021, 2022 and 2023
cc: @welcometololaland @three-drink-amy @clottedcreamfudge @everwitch-magiks @athousandrooms
@indomitable-love @dustratcentral @villiageidiot
#red white and royal blue#red white and royal blue fic#rwrb fic#rwrb#firstprince#firstprince fic#don we now (even more) gay fanfiction
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10. Captured // Alexia Putellas x Original character pt. 10
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8* - Part 9*
synopsis: Rosalie has never stayed somewhere too long. When the opportunity of a lifetime presents itself at critical moment in her life, the photographer decides to once again leave behind what she knows and joins the staff of Europe's best football team.
Word count: 5,4k
Warnings: none for this one, lot of fluff
Her conversation with Katie served as a bitter distraction during her flight back to Barcelona. She had not let herself think about the words that were spat at her face too much, wanting to enjoy the small amount of time she had left with her friends. When she arrived at the apartment, well after the two Arsenal players, she was met with two sets of eyes on her, both harbouring silent questions. One smile was enough for them to understand that there would be no talking about this and they simply motioned her to join them on the sofa. They spent the rest of the night watching cheesy romance movies and judging the characters on their poor choices and horrible taste in man.
Right now though, sitting 30 000 feet above the ground, with nothing but the soft chatter of the other passengers, Rosalie could not help but drift back to what was said. Alexia wasn’t like that. In the months she had spent with this team, she had never felt like she was being used, and she knew that the Irish defender was simply trying to get under her skin, but Rosalie had not completely healed. She was still fragile, and had just started to feel like she had found somewhere she belonged. Katie’s words, even if she would not admit it, had successfully planted a seed of doubt in her mind.
Stepping out of the airport in the warm Barcelona sun was such a relief for the photographer, who felt the tension leave her shoulders. She took a long, steady breath, the first satisfying one since boarding the plain, and closed her eyes to try and center herself a little. She had asked Lucy to come pick her up, and was slightly dreading the road back to her apartment since she was certain Leah had already told Keira about the events from the night before, and Keira would have, without a doubt, told Lucy. What Rosalie did not expect was to see a certain tattooed defender with a sophisticated Norwegian by her side.
“Hola guapa! How was your trip?” Mapi said, hugging the brunette and immediately taking her bags from her hands. Ingrid was next in line for a hug and handed her a cup of coffee, earning a grateful smile from the smaller woman.
“It was busy, very nice though. It felt good to see my old gang.” She said, refusing to get onto more details. From the side look Ingrid sent her, Rosalie knew that Ingrid was aware of some details and she was praying she wouldn’t ask. Mapi was already walking ahead, crumbling under all the bags she insisted she would carry alone and was beckoning them to follow to the car park.
“Not that I’m not happy to see you guys, but I thought Lucy was coming to get me.”
“ She was, but someone,” She said, sending a loving stare at her overly excited girlfriend, “really wanted to pick you up.” The revelation warmed the brunette’s heart who momentarily forgot the harsh words uttered towards her.
“Are you too tired to go get some food with us?” As much as the brunette was dreaming of her own bed at the moment, she also did not want to be alone.
“No no I’ll be fine, as long as it's a quiet place.”
“We were thinking about getting it to go and eat at our place, you could meet Bagheera too!” Mapi said, putting the brunette’s bag in the trunk of her car. Rosalie smiled and quickly agreed. They stopped at a small restaurant and ordered paella that they would share. Their apartment was vast and very tastefully decorated. Rosalie could see the Scandinavian twist in the decor and smiled at some colourful addition that could only be from the Spanish woman.
But the most interesting element of the space was the little ball of black fur sleeping soundly on the beige sofa. Rosalie made a beeline for the little creature, completely forgetting about the house tour she was currently in. She sat next to the cat who’s head instantly went up. She sniffed the photographer’s hand and got up, only to brush its head against her hand and start to purr loudly.
“ Bonjour mon chaton, tu es si belle, oh oui mais quelle beauté, et si gentille j’y crois pas.” She said softly while petting the small cat completely, unaware of Mapi’s presence next to her.
“I understand Alexia, hearing that just made me feel things amiga.” she said laughing while setting up the coffee table up for supper.
“What?”
“She is my best friend, I know her. Also she has been in a foul mood ever since she came back from camp and I’m pretty sure that it’ll change as soon as she sees you tomorrow.” Rosalie sent a look to Ingrid who made a face and silently agreed to her girlfriend’s statement. “And… We all saw you two back at the club.” She said winking at her.
Rosalie gave up playing dumb and simply rolled her eyes at the Spanish woman. “All of you?”
“Well, Sandra and Irene are aware since it was their plan to make Alexia mad. Patri and Pina suspect, Lucy and Keira obviously, and the rest can see that something is going on with their captain but can’t seem to pinpoint what.” Ingrid said, handing the French-Canadian a plate.
“They are blind yes.” Mapi said
“Mostly intimidated probably. Alexia is extremely protective of her private life.” Ingrid said, pouring them all a glass of white wine
“You don’t say.” Rosalie said, taking a sip, “I understand though, it seems like Martina has no boundaries. Anyway, how was the national break for you guys?”
The conversation flowed nicely all night, with Ingrid and Rosalie sharing about their respective camps and Mapi keeping them up to date on what had happened with Barça while they were gone. The brunette didn’t check the time once, which meant that she stayed very late and ended up accepting the couple’s offer to take the guest room.
National camp was always a hassle, and her weekend at Leah’s wasn’t exactly a vacation either. Add to that a night spent in an unfamiliar bed and the unrelenting flow of energy that was the Spanish defender, even early in the morning, Rosalie looked and felt like a zombie. She walked in the training center with her sunglasses still perched on her nose and a vice grip on the large coffee cup in her hand.
Dealing with Martina was the last thing she needed in her state, so she decided that it would be best if she sent one of the other photographers on the pitch, just so she could catch up on what she had missed during her time away.
It would be a small week for the photographer, with only three days before the weekend. There would be a game on Saturday but she was excited about it. Game days had become her favourite part of the job.
The thing that stressed her the most was her race quickly approaching. The Barcelona marathon was less than a week away and the French-Canadian wondered how she would deal with her level of exhaustion, work and her last lap of training.
Time seemed to pass without Rosalie noticing. She was so caught up in her emails she completely ignored her hunger. She kept working like that all through lunch and almost jumped when she was pulled out of her trance by her door opening and Lucy barging in her office.
“Didn’t your mum teach you to knock before entering?”
“Oh she’s sassy today.” Lucy said, taking a seat in the chair facing the brunette and unpacking hers and the photographer’s lunch. One look at the sandwich and her emails were forgotten. Without even glancing at the older woman, she grabbed the sandwich and took a huge bite.
“You’re welcome, ungrateful twat.”
Rosalie rolled her eyes and finished swallowing. “Merci maman.”
“Are you gonna survive your day?” She asked, grabbing her own sandwich.
“Who knows, I feel like I got buried alive under all those emails.” She said, taking a sip off her cold coffee. “ I’m so tired I can’t even focus.”
“Can’t you work from home?” The brunette took a second to contemplate the idea, and came to the conclusion that nothing productive could come from her staying here.
“I could. I probably should.” She said, A big sigh left her lips as she lowered her head to her desk
“Are you the lead photographer on Saturday’s game or are you resting for your race?”
“I’ll be working, the game is early so I’ll be fine. Leah, Lia, Steph, Beth and Viv are coming to see the game too aren’t they.” She asked, sitting up and rubbing her palms on her eyes in a vain attempt to wake herself up.
“Yes, they’ll arrive the night before. The LW’s will stay at our place while the rest have hotel rooms in town. ” Just like they had promised, her friends were coming to cheer for her during her marathon. They would be staying at Lucy and Keira’s place and hotels so the French-Canadian would not have to worry about hosting and focus solely on her race. She was touched that her friends had thought about this, but the thing that would likely keep her up, was the thought of her old life and new life colliding. She knew that in the football world, everyone knew everyone. They all had heard of each other, or played against each other, sometimes even played together. But having them all interact outside of football, seeing the girls that were with her through some of the toughest times meet the people that had brought back her happiness, that was a different story. What if they didn’t get along. Afterall, England and Spain were famous rivals on the national scene and she was very close to both of the respective captains.
Rosalie could feel the start of a nasty headache creeping in as she closed her laptop. “Allez Frenchy, gather up your stuff and go home.”
The English player was already up and picking up the empty wrappers from their lunch. “Have you spoken to Alexia since you came back?”
The mention of the captain made her heart leap a little in her chest. She had wanted to, really, but the words from Katie still resonated in her mind and the thought of them being even remotely close to the truth had kept her from reaching out. She stayed silent, knowing that Lucy was aware that she had not.
“We didn’t tell her anything if that’s what you’re scared of. We only said that you were tired from the trip. She’s clearly worried tho.”
“I’ll speak to her tonight.” She said with a smile, walking out of her office. From the windows, she could see the whole team in action. As if she had felt her presence, Alexia’s head snapped up just in time to see the photographer pass.
She could see from her posture alone just how tired she was. She knew the woman had not spent a proper night at her place since she came back, so inviting her to hers seemed like a lot. She didn’t want the brunette to feel like she was suffocating her, so she decided that she’d let her do the first move. If she wanted to see her it would be on her terms, without feeling obligated to.
She was at peace with her decision for a total of twenty minutes. The look on Lucy’s face when she came back on the pitch, along with Keira's quiet but audible “is she ok?” were enough for the blonde to lose her cool. She herself had a hard time understanding why she felt protective over the brunette but truly it didn’t matter.
Concentrating for the rest of training turned out to be a difficult task, but Alexia sped through the rest of the exercises and was one of the first off the pitch. This behavior was very uncommon for the Barcelona captain which left a few of the girls confused. Only two had an idea why the midfielder was so eager to end this session.
“You should bring her pasta. It’s what Sara has recommended her to eat a week before her race and she’s a sucker for good pasta.” Lucy said when Alexia walked past her. The midfielder stopped in her tracks.
“Rosalia has not had a moment alone since she came back, you don’t think I should let her be?” She was surprised that the woman who acted like a big sister towards the photograph would encourage her to pursue the French-Canadian.
“I can’t tell you why, but being alone is not what she needs right now.” Lucy said with a hint of sadness and worry in her eyes. “Oh, and bring Nala, she’ll be so happy.” That was all the Catalonian needed to hear. Her plan was simple. She would go to her apartment to leave her training bag and pick up Nala. She would then go to the market and get all the ingredients she needed and walk back to Rosalie’s place.
It was around dinner time when Alexia arrived in front of the photographer’s building. She was glad she didn’t have to wait long until someone exited so she could let herself in without having to ring a random doorbell. The thing the blonde had clearly not thought of, was her little dog remembering the space, and most likely, smelling the photographer through the door.
As soon as Alexia reached the apartment door, Nala started to bark and jump, scratching the door with her little paws. Alexia cringed at the ruckus her dog was making and tried to calm her but nothing was working. She was about to drop all her bags and pick up the little beast when the sound of the door opening made her look up.
Rosalie was groggy. She was sleeping on her couch after succumbing to her fatigue while working when barking had pulled her from her slumber. She knew that there were no dog owners in her building and the sound was from right outside her door. She surely wasn’t prepared to see Alexia crouched down in front of her door, fighting with the small dog who was hell bent on freeing herself and running towards the photographer.
“Ale? What are you doing here?” The footballer stood up with the little excited dog still wiggling in her arms. Rosalie smiled widely and motionned to the player to pass Nala to her, which she gladly did. While Rosalie was busy greeting the fluff ball, Alexia picked up the grocery bags and made her way to the brunette's kitchen. She was happy to see that the woman had not started dinner yet and immediately started to prepare the food.
“ Ale, are you gonna tell me why you are here?” She asked, sitting down at the breakfast bar, Nala still in her arms.
“I am making you dinner! I can go after, if you want me to, but I know you are tired and I wanted to do this for you.” Rosalie could feel tears threatening to fall as she watched the blonde work silently. It took a moment for Alexia to realize the smaller woman had not moved from her spot in front of her.
“You can do your things like normal Rosalie, just act like I am not here.” She said, finally turning towards her. Upon seeing her eyes, Alexia walked around the kitchen island and crouched down in front of the photographer. “What’s wrong?”
“ Nothing, this is perfect.” The brunette said, whipping away her tears with the hand that wasn’t holding Nala. Alexia understood why the English couple was worried. She took her hand and guided her to the sofa where she could see a pillow and a pile of blankets.
“ You can rest more, I will wake you when the food is ready.” Rosalie got comfortable once more, with the little pomeranian snuggling in her arms. It didn’t take long for her to fall asleep once more.
It took Alexia a little more than half an hour to cook enough food so that the brunette would also have lunches ready. The sight she was met with when she moved to the living room warmed her heart. The brunette was bundled up in thick blankets in a fetal position and all that could be seen from the small dog were her little ears sticking out of the blanket. Alexia quickly snapped pictures of the two before carefully waking her up.
They ate together in comfortable silence, simply contempt in each other’s presence. Alexia insisted on doing the dishes herself, not wanting for the photographer to have anything to do once she would be gone. Rosalie took place at the counter with her laptop. She needed to finish a couple things before bed but she found that watching the captain so at ease in her kitchen was very distracting. This was as domestic as it could be, and it felt so natural, easy.
Once she was done, Alexia took a seat next to the photographer, closed her laptop and scooted closer. She turned around to face the blonde and as soon as their eyes met, she felt the remaining tension slowly escape her. Alexia’s hand reached up to tuck a strand of hair that had escaped from Rosalie’s bun, and finished her path on her cheek. She leaned into her hand and closed her eyes, basking in the warmth of her palm.
“Thank you so much.” Rosalie whispered, not wanting to break the stillness of this moment.
“I am happy to do this for you.” She whispered back, slowly inching closer. “Rosalia..”
The word was but a breath on the footballer’s lips. She was so close Rosalie felt the air tickling her cheek. Their forehead connected, closing the distance even more.
“Yes?”
“Can I kiss you?” She sounded almost uncertain, as if she was scared the brunette would reject her. The thought alone almost pulled a chuckle from Rosalie.
“Oui, please.” She said, almost desperately, “You never have to ask again.”Her lips felt like coming home. How is it that after so little time, this woman had managed to break down all her defense and slithered her way into the depths of her mind.
The kiss was soft, unhurried. Their lips danced together, only parting to let out shuddering breaths. Rosalie reached out, pulling the blonde closer. It was like every part of her being was calling out for her. The heat was rising quickly, the need to be closer, feel her warmth invade all-consuming.
Rosalie was almost ashamed at the whine that escaped her when the footballer pulled away, leaving the forehead connected, as if she too, couldn’t fathom being separated just yet. “Rosalia, this is not what you need tonight.” She whispered, her hand caressing her cheek.
As good as her lips felt, Rosalie knew that the blonde was right. And yet, she could not let the blonde go. “ Can you stay please?” She asked in a broken voice that made Alexia’s heart shatter.
“Of course preciosa.” Alexia borrowed the same clothes she did the night before camp and stayed in the living room while the photographer went to shower. There was a shelf in the bookcase with what seemed like a collection of photo albums. They all had years written on the spine. Alexia picked one from what she assumed would be the brunette’s college years and sat on the sofa.
She was still flipping through the pages when the brunette emerged from the bathroom, hair still wet and only wearing underwear and an oversized t-shirt. It took a lot of self control for the blonde to keep her eyes from trailing down her toned legs. She put aside the album and took the hand Rosalie was holding out for her.
They settled together in bed, Alexia’s arms wrapped around her protectively. In this position, sleep came to her very easily. It was arguably the best sleep she had had since leaving for camp and the brunette most definitely needed it.
The wake up in itself, was everything but peaceful. She could not breathe. It was like her face was blocked by something warm and fury, with hair getting in her nose and mouth. She panicked and rose from the bed, grabbing the ball of fluff that had conveniently chosen her face as a resting spot. She coughed up a few hairs, still holding the dog at arm's length.
She was still groggy from sleep, but it did not keep her from registering the sound of Alexia’s laughter echoing next to her. “Your little beast almost killed me and you’re laughing?” She said indignantly, bringing Nala to her chest and kissing her head. She simply could not be mad at the little dog, but could definitely direct her anger towards the owner.
“You were so peaceful, you slept through the alarm, so I thought you needed something a little stronger to wake you up.” The smile on Alexia’s face was simply radiant. Her hair was wild from her night of sleep and her eyes were shining brightly in the morning light. Rosalie could not do anything but smile at the blonde and put the little dog down, only to jump on the blonde to playfully attack her.
This playful mood persisted all throughout the day. From the car ride to Alexia’s place so she could drop off Nala and pick up her training stuff, to their interaction on the pitch during training. Rosalie managed to capture the biggest amount of shots of Alexia smiling at the camera, although everyone knew it wasn’t at the camera she was smiling at, but rather the small woman behind it.
The build up to Saturday’s game was a lot smoother than usual. With the Barça captain’s mood having brightened a lot and the excitement of a home game palpable, all smiles could be seen in the viewing room. As soon as the meeting started, there was nothing but determination written on the girls faces.
There was only one who seemed out of it. She was always like this before a race. In her head, quiet, but inside, her mind was roaring. Her fears, her strategies, her goal pace, her desired splits, she was mapping everything out, leaving nothing to chance.
To everyone’s eyes, Rosalie looked empty, which concerned some of the girls who, instead of disturbing the photographer, seeked out answers in Lucy and Keira. The girls knew that Rosalie was simply in her game mode and would likely stay that way til after the race.
The only person who seemed to pull a smile from the brunette was none other than the captain herself. However fleeting it might have been, she was proud to have been the one to make her smile.
Sunday was game day, and Rosalie vowed to herself , for the sake of her friends, to be there for them. Tonight, she would have time to worry for herself. So she pulled up at the stadium coffee in hand and ready for a home game.
She was the one capturing the player's arrival. She loved this part almost just as much as the game itself. The girls were all smiles yet again, confident in their abilities and preparation. Upon seeing the photographer smiling they all greeted her similarly, often hugging her or high fiving her.
As always, when Alexia came around the corner, Rosalie’s breath caught in her throat. She was wearing a dark green tennis skirt, a white shirt and that leather jacket that made the photographer drool. She was mesmerizing and Rosalie could hardly hide her staring even behind her camera.
The blond stopped in front of her and opened her arms. Her familiar smell automatically calmed her.
« Ça va bien aller, Rosie, tu es prête. » She whispered in her ear before pulling away. Rosalie was too stunned to speak. Although heavily accented, Alexia’s sentence was flawless and the photographer could not help but smile widely at the thought of the footballer learning this for her.
Out on the field, the sun was shining bright and the stands were almost full. She immediately spotted her little group of friends frantically waving her way. She waved back and prepped her equipment.
It was a wonderful game. Five nil with a beautiful header from Alexia and a goal from Mapi. The pictures she had taken of their celebration together were some of her favourites she had taken so far at Barcelona. It showed perfectly how strong their friendship was. She’d had to print it out and give it to them later.
As she suspected, her friends had walked down and were stepping on the pitch as she was taking off her media bib. Leah was the first to reach the photographer, sneaking behind her and grabbing her in a tight hug from behind.
“ Howdy Frenchy, ready for your big day?” She asked, resting her chin on the brunette’s shoulder. Rosalie grabbed her hands around her waist and laughed as the blond lifted her and essentially carried her towards the group of Arsenal players. She did not let go, even after putting her down.
Alexia was very aware of that fact. She was on the other side of the pitch signing jerseys and greeting fans, but she could not help but keep a close eye on the brunette. She had seen Leah approach her, seen the way her arms had wrapped around her, and this was simply not sitting right with her.
She was aware, in the back of her mind, that Rosalie had confirmed that Leah was with the Swiss captain, and of the remaining fans' eyes following her every move, but for a second, these details evaded her mind.
She crossed the distance separating her and the photographer in a few seconds and arrived behind the two. The only problem was that she did not, for the life of her, think about what she would say once she had reached the little group.
The girls got quiet upon seeing the Spanish captain. Rosalie and Leah both made a curious face before turning around. Rosalie smiled widely at the Catalonian and opened her arms.
“That was such a beautiful goal Ale!” She said while the girl was holding her.
“Thank you bonita.” They were then met with a stunned group of five women who had certainly not put Alexia Putellas hugging their best friend in front of them, and a stadium full of fans, on their bingo card.
“Hola,” The Spanish woman said upon seeing their dumbfounded looks. She stepped closer to them, her hand never leaving the brunette’s waist. “Did you enjoy the game?”
They all knew each other, having played against each other for club and country, so introductions were not a need. It was very weird for Rosalie, seeing everyone interact like that. She noticed Alexia was colder towards Leah, and the reaction was clearly amusing the English captain. They all exchanged a few words, asking about their season so far, with Viv and Alexia clearly hitting it off thanks to them being the biggest football nerds the brunette had ever met. During their conversation, Alexia’s hand never left Rosalie’s hips. It was a calming, grounding touch which the photographer welcomed greatly.
The stadium was slowly emptying. The fans were bustling with happiness after such a wonderful victory. Even the staff was nearly done picking up the remaining equipment and eager to go home to finally relax. The only people on the pitch were Rosalie and her small band of footballers. They all spoke and laughed together, unaware that someone was watching them.
From the mezzanine, Martina had a perfect view of the Arsenal players along with the Barcelona captain and photographer. An idea started to bloom in her mind.
“Ok I think it might be time to go, Rosalia.” Alexia whispered in her ear. She was right, dinner was quickly approaching and she needed to be in bed early. The start of the race was at eight in the morning and god knows Rosalie would not sleep much tonight.
She in fact, did not. She was up at five, already dressed in her lucky red sports bra, a black zip-up hoodie and running short, and pacing around. Her oatmeal was getting cold on her breakfast counter. Lucy was picking her up. It was their little tradition. Ever since she had moved to England, every racing event she had been a part of, Lucy had always been the one driving her, something about needing family to be there for her.
Lucy arrived at her apartment at six, because she knew that Rosalie would not have eaten anything. It was always the same. She would arrive an hour before the agreed time, eat breakfast with the Canadian, more like force feeding her, and leave, all of this mostly done in silence. Rosalie always felt bad for her pre-race attitude but Lucy understood. She had worked with countless superstitious players with weird and annoying rituals, silence was the most peaceful she had encountered for sure.
It was usually when they arrived on site that Rosalie’s tongue got loose. “Will they be there at the start?”
“Yes, and someone will be there at every water stop, everything is already planned.” Lucy said, squeezing the photographer’s hand. They got out of the car and Rosalie headed straight for the English women and engulfed her in a hug. “Thank you for being here, ma grande soeur.”
“Je t’aime, tu le sais ça”
“Je t’aime aussi, Luce”
The tent was full of runners. Some clearly experienced and others who seemed like it was their first ever race. Rosalie respected all of them, she knew how hard your first was and she valued all the training that went into this sport. She also loved the community built around it, whatever your level of experience, they were all here together with a common goal in mind, reach the finish line. She found an empty bench at the back of the tent and pulled out her trusty Asics Metaspeed. Before lacing them up, she took out her noise cancelling earbuds and pooped them in. She hardly ever ran with music, but she purchased them solely for their nose cancelling abilities.
Ten minutes before the star and Rosalie was outside the tent stretching. She could see the growing crowd assembling around the inflatable arch where the signal would be given. Her friends were likely already there, with Beth, Leah and Keira complaining about how early it was and Viv, Lia and Lucy attempting to tame their grumpiness.A part of her mind hoped she would see Alexia somewhere, maybe with some of the Barça girls, but she wasn’t getting her hopes up, after all, she had not even thought about properly inviting them.
Five minutes before the start. She was walking slowly towards the starting line, making her path among the other runners. She had a goal in mind, and so she needed to start this race at the front. She smiled at the other racers, the apprehension palpable in the air, as she advanced more and more towards the front line.
Two minutes before the signal. Rosalie was happy with the spot she had managed to slither into. Almost in the middle, completely at the front. all she could hear was the sound of her breathing. Her heart was pounding in her chest as her eyes scanned the crowd for the first time.
Hundreds of people were screaming and cheering for their loved ones, and at the front, right behind the gate was her family. She smiled at them and waved. It took a second for her to realize that they were in fact, not alone. More than half of the Barcelona femini team was at their side, cheering with homemade signs.
Thirty seconds before the start, Rosalie's green eyes met with hazel ones. She was smiling, a calm expression on her face. She was here. A new kind of determination lit up inside her.
The signal was finally heard and all that was left to do was put one foot in front of the other.
#barcelona femeni#woso community#alexia putellas#woso fanfics#woso imagine#barca femeni#futfem#alexia putellas x reader#alexia x reader#alexia putellas x y/n#keira walsh#lucy bronze#mapi leon
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I'm processing a lot of emotions tonight and I keep being drawn back to Good Omens--not just because it's the new hyperfixation or because it's so good. That's what I thought it was, at first.
But this year--hell, the last 3 or 4 months especially, I finally started taking steps to accepting and being myself. I'm rapidly approaching middle age and I'm only just now beginning to feel like I'm allowed to be me. I came out to the people in my household, a few select friends, and a few select family members--most of whom were wholly supportive. I started testosterone injections. I stopped trying to be someone I'm not. I stopped hiding who I am and who I love.
What does this have to do with Good Omens? Nothing. But also... Everything.
So much queer representation is in characters vastly younger than me--and that's good! I want queer kids to feel safe and loved and accepted in ways I never did. They deserve better than we had. And it gives me hope for their futures. I bawled like a baby when I watched The Owl House with my son and he was totally unphazed by the queerness. It's just how people are to him.
But when something like Good Omens comes along and not only grabs every opportunity to show average, everyday old(er) queer representation... It just. I've never felt more seen. More accepted. More hope for all our futures. And season 2 just knocked that out of the fucking park. And the nonbinary, genderfluid, and genderqueer rep? My God.
And it's not subtext, it's not it's own separate plotline where they're fighting for acceptance or dealing with hateful bigotry... It's just... Accepted. It's normal. No one questions it. No one even comments on it.
It's people of any age (even millions of years old) being unapologetically themselves and loving who they love openly and fully (with one notable uncommunicative group of two ineffable idiots, but they'll get there).
I just.
I can't express how grateful I am to see older queer rep at this time in my life. It's been a rough year, and I expect it'll get rougher before it gets better. But I've never been happier in my own skin, and it means the absolute world to see my literary and media heroes like Neil Gaiman, David Tennant, and Michael Sheen (and Terry Pratchett and everyone who worked on Good Omens, honestly) making this beautiful, messy, adorable, excruciating, wonderful, heartbreaking, ethereal, down-to-earth tale.
There aren't enough words in all the languages of the world to express how I'm feeling. "Thank you" just feels... Insufficient.
I just hope they know how much it means to people like me, especially after a lifetime of buried subtext and overt queerbaiting and media ridicule and general lack of acceptance, to experience this story with them.
#And I get it#This should be the norm not the exception#But if we don't appreciate the exceptions when they come along#They'll never become the norm#thank you#with all my heart#neil gaiman#david tennant#michael sheen#good omens 2#good omens season 2#good omens#queer#nonbinary#genderqueer#genderfluid#lgbtq+#lgbtqia+#representation matters#ineffable idiots
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A Lot of Time has Passed | Part 4
Series Masterlist | Masterlist
Season 4 Rafe x Maybank reader
Summary: Beginning at the time jump, the Pogues seemingly succeeded at something, Rafe is struggling with making amends and being a better person. JJs sister left the island after returning from South America. Returning after 18 months with a secret.
Not proofread
Word count: 6k
Warnings: MDNI mentions of abortion (no procedure done), quick smut but a little more romantic
Other than that none- Rafe and Maybank are just super sweet with each other.
You wake up around 5 a.m., a habit you picked up in a desperate attempt to carve out a few precious moments of solitude before V wakes up. This early morning routine has become a sacred ritual for you; a chance to sip your coffee in peace and gather your thoughts. As you stir beneath the soft sheets, you momentarily forget that you’re wrapped in Rafe’s strong arms, a warmth that both comforts and constrains you. The gentle shift in your position seems to awaken him, and with a groggy voice, he murmurs, “Good morning. What the hell time is it?”
You glance at the clock, the numbers flickering softly in the dim light. “It’s 5 a.m., welcome to parenthood,” you reply with a teasing smirk. “No more sleeping until 2 in the afternoon, like we used to do during those nights of coke and tequila.” A wave of nostalgia washes over you, the memory of carefree days filled with reckless abandon now contrast against the responsibilities of parenthood.
Sitting upright, you feel the cool air against your skin, the bed sheets clinging to your torso as neither of you had the energy to bother getting fully dressed again. You turn to face Rafe, taking in his tousled hair and the hint of a sleepy smile on his face. “Do you want to get anything off your chest?” you ask, your voice gentle but probing.
Rafe sits up alongside you, and the sight of his biceps flexing as he pulls himself into an upright position sends a small thrill through you. You watch him closely, admiring the way he carries both strength and tenderness. “That thing your brother said last night…” he begins cautiously, lacing his fingers through yours, the warmth of his palm grounding you. “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had… you know. But why didn’t you?”
The question about an abortion that didn’t even happen hangs in the air between you, heavy with unspoken tensions and emotions. You forced him and you to forget about it last night but it was impossible to not bring it up after the storm between the two of you settled. You know the weight of your brother’s words, how they lingered long after the night had ended. The tension in Rafe’s voice hints at his own concerns, but there’s also a sense of trust woven into his question. He wants to understand—not just the choices you make, but the person you are becoming, too.
You take a deep breath, the morning light creeping in through the window, casting a soft glow around the room. “It’s complicated,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper. “It wasn’t just about me answering my brother. It was about what kind of person I want to be. What kind of parent I want to be.”
Rafe nods, tightening his grip on your hand as if to draw you closer to him, as if that simple act could somehow provide clarity. “I get that,” he replies, his eyes searching yours for understanding. “It’s just that sometimes, I wonder how we got here. From those crazy nights to this… to our life now. It’s a lot.”
You chuckle softly at the contrast, the laughter carrying with it a weight of fondness. “It is a lot,” you agree, glancing down at your interlaced fingers. He continues, “But I wouldn’t change it for anything. You, me, V... we’re building something together, even if it's not always easy. Even if some days will feel more chaotic than others. It’s only been a day but I know it.”
Rafe’s eyes soften, and in that moment, you both realize that despite the exhaustion that comes with parenting and the burdens of the past, you are now in this together. The world beyond your bedroom may be demanding, but here, in the quiet sanctuary you’ve created, there’s an unspoken promise that binds you—one built on love, understanding, and a shared commitment to navigate this unpredictable journey together.
You take a deep breath, gathering your thoughts as the weight of your emotions presses down on you. Finally, you begin to speak again, the words tumbling out like a confession long overdue. “I don’t know,” you say, your voice trembling slightly. “I kept promising myself that I would reach out. I really wanted to, especially when I first left. I still wanted you to know but I couldn’t bring myself to call you. It felt so urgent back then, like if I could just put everything behind me, I might finally find peace. I wasn’t lying when I said that if I thought you didn’t want me, then you wouldn’t want her either. But I realized I was just trying to convince myself to feel better about not telling you.”
You take a moment, your gaze focused on Rafe’s hand, which is resting on your knee underneath the blanket. It serves as a silent point of connection—a tether to the complicated feelings swirling in your heart. “I wanted to forget about you and just move on. I thought it would be easier that way. But by the time I believed I had the strength to do it, it was too far in the pregnancy anyways. I didn’t even realize. Those first few weeks were such a blur. I found myself clinging to good memories with you instead of letting them go. And, strangely enough, I didn’t want to forget you. She’s my little reminder of you and the good in you, the person I always believed you could be.”
You look up, locking eyes with Rafe, who is intently focused on you. His gaze is unwavering, and you can feel the heat of his stare seeping into you, igniting a storm of unresolved feelings. You look back down as tears begin to well up in your eyes, spilling over and landing on both of your hands. “I can be good,” he says softly, determination lacing his words. “For both of you. I swear, I can be that person.”
With a sudden movement, he pulls you into a tight embrace, enveloping you in a warmth that feels both comforting and overwhelming. His lips brush against your temple, planting gentle kisses moving towards your mouth that send shivers down your spine. “What? Rafe, no… that’s not what I meant…” you stammer, but before you can even finish the sentence, he leans in and captures your lips with his.
The kiss is electric, stirring up emotions you thought you had buried—a mix of longing, fear, and undeniable connection. It feels like a lifeline thrown into the chaotic sea of your heart, and in that moment, everything else fades away. It was deep and passionate unlike the hungry ones from last night.
You knew that Rafe had built a life with Sofia since you’d been gone, a life that, although distant from yours, still resonated with echoes of your shared past. The reality of their relationship weighed heavily on you, and you couldn't deny the guilt curling in the pit of your stomach. It was a familiar feeling, one that stirred up memories both sweet and bitter. Last night, as you lay tangled in each other’s arms, felt like an inevitable culmination of the years spent together—years where you both played with fire, never quite willing to step away from its warmth. No matter how challenging things got, no matter the stark differences between your worlds, you had always been each other's exceptions.
Now, as Rafe's lips lingered on yours, a torrent of remorse washed over you, clashing violently with the sparks igniting in your chest. How could you let this happen? Memories of Sofia came rushing in, darkening the intimate moment with heavy shades of regret. She had always treated you with kindness, her sweet disposition refreshing amidst the chaos of work and life. A gentle smile here, a supportive word there—she was the kind of person who made the world feel just a little brighter. Plus, the fact that she lived close, about three-quarters of a mile down from you made it all the more complicated. It wasn’t just her proximity; it was the palpable intertwining of lives that made this situation feel even more convoluted.
You truly didn’t want to disrupt Rafe’s life like this. The last thing you wanted was to be the storm that tore apart the fragile peace he had finally found. You had admired him from afar during your time apart, hopeful for his happiness even if it meant living without him. A part of you had always wished him well, and now, here you were—teetering on the edge of an emotional cliff, grappling with the depths of your feelings for him while knowing full well the consequences.
“Rafe,” you finally murmur, breaking away from the spell of his kiss, your voice barely a whisper. The warmth of his embrace still lingered, but the weight of reality crashed back into focus. “What are we doing?”
His brow furrows, confusion mingling with concern in his eyes. You can see he wants to say something profound, something that would bridge the gap between your hearts and your histories, but the moment stretches painfully, leaving only an unspoken tension hovering between you. You take a deep breath, steadying yourself against the rising tide of emotions. “What about Sofia?”
Rafe’s expression shifts, and for a fleeting moment, you see the conflict in his gaze. It mirrors your own, a mixture of desire and dread—the push and pull of what you both truly want against what is right. “I… I’m not sure,” he admits, his voice filled with an honesty that cuts deep. “But I can’t pretend these feelings don’t exist. They’ve always been there for you. It was always supposed to be me and you.”
You nod slowly, your heart pounding. As much as you yearned for this connection, a part of you knew it came at a cost. And with every passing moment, that cost began to feel heavier, a weight you were both now grappling to understand.
Before you can fully process what’s happening, Rafe grabs you by the waist, pulling you onto him with an intensity that takes your breath away. His lips crash against yours once more, igniting a fire that you thought you could contain. It’s deep and full of raw lust, an electric connection that sets every nerve in your body alight. Against all reason, you melt into him, surrendering to the familiar heat that radiates from his touch, instinctively kissing back with a passion that feels both exhilarating and terrifying.
Every kiss pulls you deeper into the moment, flooding your senses with the realization of what you’ve longed for—what you’ve both longed for. You can feel him hardening beneath you, a palpable reminder of the desire simmering just beneath the surface. As you start to clench around nothing, a rush of eagerness sweeps through you, and you become instantly soaked with anticipation and longing, a primal need coursing through your veins.
With a shaky breath, you lift yourself slightly, allowing the heat of the moment to guide you. Your hands move instinctively to hold him, feeling the warmth radiating from his body. You align him carefully, your heart racing with every pulse of adrenaline. The world outside fades completely as you focus on this singular moment, the intimate connection that binds you both together. The vulnerability of it all feels exhilarating, as if the two of you are suspended in time, connected in a way that transcends all the complexities surrounding you.
“Are you sure?” Rafe breathes, his voice a mixture of longing and caution. His eyes search yours, filled with desire but also a hint of desire to keep things right, to ensure he isn’t crossing a line.
You nod, affirmation pouring from your soul. The weight of your past hangs in the air, but in this moment, none of that matters. You can’t deny how desperately you crave this connection, how drawn you are to him despite everything—the desire eclipsing the doubts swirling in your mind. “Yes,” you whisper, urgency lacing your voice, “I need this.”
With that shared understanding, the tension melts into action, and you guide him closer, heart racing as you feel the warmth of him against you, ready to break free of the confines that have held you both back for too long. The world outside disappears, leaving just Rafe, you, and the intoxicating pull between you that refuses to be ignored.
You slowly sink onto him, each tantalizing inch igniting a wave of sensation that sends a loud gasp escaping your lips. The fullness of him fills you, and the feeling is overwhelming in the best way possible. You want to feel every inch of him, every moment oh him stretching you out feels like an eternity, and god, does it feel good. A rush of warmth surges through you as he fills you up, feeding a craving you’ve kept buried for far too long.
Your fingers instinctively grip the back of his neck, anchoring yourself to him as if you’re afraid to lose this moment, this connection. The world outside your little haven dissolves, leaving only the two of you, caught in a blissful embrace that is both electrifying and tender. As you finally reach the bottom, you both stop, the heat between you simmering as you stare deeply into each other’s eyes.
Heavy breaths mingle in the air, a mix of exhilaration and wonder as you take in the fullness of this moment—the warmth radiating from his body, the way his eyes search yours, filled with an intensity that makes your heart race. You can feel the weight of him inside you, a beautiful reminder of the bond you share, both thrilling and grounding.
The silence wraps around you like a soft blanket, charged with the pulse of your connected bodies and racing hearts. You see the flicker of vulnerability in Rafe’s gaze, mirroring the swirl of emotions within you. The moment feels sacred as you both navigate this new territory, each aware of the potential consequences but unwilling to let fear overshadow the undeniable pull you share.
“I can’t believe we’re here,” he breathes, breaking the stillness, his voice thick with emotion. The impossibility of the moment laces his words, and you nod, your heart swelling at the truth buried within them.
“I think this feels right,” you whisper, your voice barely above a breath. You lean in closer, your foreheads touching lightly, finding solace in each other’s warmth. The world beyond your bubble may be complicated, but here and now, in this moment, everything feels perfectly aligned.
With every heartbeat, you grow more aware of how deeply intertwined your lives have become, how this connection, born from a mixture of love, longing, and undeniable chemistry, feels like coming home. You close your eyes, letting yourself get lost in the bliss of it all, drinking in the moment, ready to embrace whatever comes next.
You begin to bounce on him, the sensation taking you by surprise as pleasure courses through your body in waves. It’s been far too long since you’ve felt anything like this, at this angle, and it feels unreal—every movement sending shockwaves of ecstasy radiating through you. The world outside your intimate bubble fades away completely, leaving only the rhythm of your bodies intertwined in perfect harmony.
Rafe’s hands grip your waist tightly, guiding you with a tenderness that contrasts to the primal energy of the moment. He helps you lift up and down, his motions strong and sure, as he knows exactly how to heighten the pleasure you’re both experiencing. He knows your body well. But still allowing you to maintain control. With each rise and fall, a chorus of moans spills from your lips, unrestrained and raw, mingling with the deep grunts of approval that escape him. The sound reverberates in your ears, igniting a fire deep within you that you didn’t know had been smoldering.
Every thrust brings you closer to that edge, the sensation intense and blissful. You can feel the heat pooling in your core as you ride him, your body responding instinctively to the rhythm, craving more. This connection—this union of flesh and desire—feels powerful, liberating in a way that makes your heart soar even as the weight of guilt lingers at the edges of your mind.
“You’re beautiful,” Rafe breathes, his voice rough with desire, drawing you deeper into the moment. The way he looks at you, filled with admiration and intense longing, drives you wild. You meet his gaze, every ounce of vulnerability laid bare, and you can’t help but smile through your moans. Not bothering to hear something in return. He can tell how lost you are off him. Eyes are rolling back and you can’t close your mouth from the pleasure.
The tempo builds, the air thick with heat and the intoxicating scent of desire. You can feel his strength beneath you, every muscle tensed as he assists your every movement, supporting you, urging you on. Lost in each other, you surrender completely to the ecstasy enveloping you, letting go of every worry that has plagued you. “That’s it baby, ride me just like that. You know how I love it.”
It’s just the two of you, bodies moving in unison, caught in a whirlwind of passion, trapped in a moment that feels infinite. You lose yourself in the sheer pleasure of it all, the ultimate expression of connection that you both so desperately craved. Nothing else matters but the way he fills you, the way your bodies fit together, and the pure ecstasy of this forbidden reunion.
You start to feel the telltale signs of your impending release, the tension building within you like a coiled spring. The pleasure is overwhelming, and you realize you no longer have the strength to keep bouncing. Instead, you wrap your arms around Rafe, seeking the comfort of his embrace. You bury your face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the familiar scent of him, grounding yourself in the moment despite the chaos of emotions swirling around you.
Your instinct prompts you to bite down gently on his skin, a playful attempt to muffle the sounds that threaten to escape your lips, desperate to contain your pleasure in the heat of the moment. The taste of him only fuels the fire inside you, igniting a deeper need that sends shivers down your spine.
Rafe understands right away. He senses your shift, the way your body begins to respond in a different rhythm. Leaning back slightly, he gives you the support you need, anchoring himself against the bed. His hands still grip your waist, strong yet gentle, as he takes control of the pace. You feel him shift, and then he thrusts up into you from below, driving you deeper into that sweet, sweet spot within you.
The sensation is electrifying. He fills you completely, poking your cervix with every push of his cock. With every thrust, the world outside dissolves, leaving only the two of you lost in the throes of bliss. You feel your body tighten around him, every muscle engaged as you surrender to the rhythm he sets. Those thrusts, deep and deliberate, send shockwaves of ecstasy coursing through you, pushing you closer and closer to the edge.
“God, you’re incredible,” he murmurs, his breath hot against your ear, sending more shivers racing down your spine. The way he moves, the way he looks up at you with those intense, darkened eyes—everything about this moment seems to coalesce into something transcendent.
“Y-you too,” you manage to gasp out, your voice laced with desire. “You feel so good Rafe…”
He responds with another deep thrust, and you can’t help but moan louder, “Rafe… I’m so close.”
You can feel it building relentlessly, the pressure mounting as every thrust drives you further into the sweet abyss. You cling to him, seeking that ever-elusive release, feeling as if the two of you are in sync, almost like you were made for this.
You can’t contain the moans that finally spill from your lips, muffled slightly against his neck but no less passionate. Rafe responds in kind, the low growls of pleasure reverberating through his chest only fanning the flames of your desire. You know it won’t be long now—every movement, every breath, every shared glance contributing to the rising tide that promises to overwhelm you both. He’s kissing your chest, neck to the top of your breasts.
“Just let go,” he whispers, his voice a low rumble, urging you on as he continues to fill you deeply, the connection tightening around you like a fragile thread ready to snap. The warmth spreads, and you succumb willingly, ready to embrace the ecstasy that awaits.
You shoot him a heated glance, your heart pounding in tandem with your body. “I need you… needed to feel you like this,” you breathe, clinging to him as pleasure spirals higher. His thumb drops down to your clit rubbing in circles with great pressure.
“Don’t stop,” you whisper urgently, leaning closer, your breath mingling with his. “I’m right there. Just a little more…”
Rafe responds with a growl of approval, the connection tightening around you like a fragile thread ready to snap. You embrace the ecstasy that awaits, ready to lose yourself completely in the bliss that you’ve both ignited. He grips your hips harder, definitely bruising them and thrusting harder.
“Ugh, Rafe, fuck,” you gasp, feeling the unmistakable wave of pleasure cresting within you. “I’m so close too, baby. Let go now.” His groan resonates in your ear, vibrating through your entire body, and that sound is all you need to send you spiraling over the edge. Yet even in that bliss, he doesn’t stop chasing his own high, each thrust sending you further into a blissful haze.
“Please, in me… I need to feel you,” you manage to plead, urgency lacing your words. You’re shaking as you hold onto him. Rafe responds with a series of powerful, deliberate thrusts, each one pushing himself closer to the brink. Then, with a final, deep thrust, you feel him release, filling you to the brim with his hot liquid. His body collapses beneath you. You follow him down, your forehead resting gently against his, both of you gasping for breath, trying to come back to reality.
You brush the tip of your nose against his, a playful connection that elicits a soft smile amidst the heated passion. With sweat glistening on both your bodies, you look into his eyes, searching for the reassurance only he can provide.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” he whispers, cupping your cheeks in his hands before kissing you deeply. When he pulls back, his gaze is intense, and he says, “God, you’re a dream come true. Truly, I’ve dreamed of having you back in my life every night since you left.”
You can’t help but feel the sting of tears gather in your eyes. The highs of your passionate encounter mingle with the flood of emotions rushing back in, a bittersweet reminder of everything that’s come before and what will happen as a result of this.
“No, no, no, don’t cry,” Rafe murmurs, panic flickering across his features. “I’m going to figure this all out. Please, put your trust in me. You and me, baby—all the way. I swear. Don’t worry about anyone else.”
His words wash over you like a calming wave, and you look back up at him, nodding with a small smile that betrays the whirlwind of thoughts churning within. Emotions aside, this is everything you’ve ever wanted with Rafe, and you know how much it means for V, too. You want to make up for the time you caused her to lose with him and embrace the future full of possibility.
Rafe leans in, kissing you again. You both smile into the kisses, the connection palpable.
Eventually, you get off him, wrapping a blanket around yourself as he pulls on his boxers. In a hushed quiet, you sneak into the bathroom, turning on the shower before you pull him in behind you. The warm water cascades over you, enveloping you in a comforting embrace. You wrap your arms around him, finding solace in his presence. He rubs gentle circles on your back and kisses the top of your head, both of you savoring the calm of the moment. You stand like that for a while, simply enjoying the feeling of being together, before finally washing up and stepping out.
Holding hands, you head back to your room, and as you pass the kitchen, you freeze in place upon seeing JJ. The tension hangs heavy in the air as neither of you speaks, simply staring at one another. It’s JJ who breaks the silence, his voice somewhat hesitant. “Hey, uh, can we talk for a sec?”
You look up at Rafe. He nods quickly, encouraging you silently, before you turn back to JJ, who is already walking closer to you. He completely ignores Rafe’s presence, focusing instead on you.
“What’s up?” you ask, folding your arms defensively. JJ shrugs and pulls you in for a hug, his expression earnest. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea what I said until I sobered up a bit and Kie yelled at me. I didn’t mean it. I could never mean it. I love the hell outta that little girl.”
“I know you didn’t, J. But it doesn’t change the fact that it hurt.” You step back, meeting his gaze, his frown tugging at your heartstrings.
“J, it’s okay—really, I swear. I could never hate you.” With a small smile, you extend your pinky out, waiting for him to wrap his around it. A pinky promise. It’s a gesture you both shared since childhood, a way of keeping each other safe from the turbulent lives you had to navigate. Keeping you both safe from Luke’s outburst. He finally meets your finger, and you pull him back into another hug.
“Love you, J.”
“Love you too, sis,” he replies, his voice warm as he pulls back.
You walk back into your room, where Rafe is already dressed, the sunlight streaming in through the windows. It’s 6:30 AM now—later than you intended for V to wake up. You quickly dress, and together, Rafe and you head to get her up.
“Hi, sleepy baby, time to get up,” Rafe says gently, rubbing her back. Almost immediately, V awakens with her signature huge smile. She reaches up for Rafe, and he scoops her up effortlessly, showering her cheeks with playful kisses. She giggles, trying to push him away in her adorable way, and your heart swells as you watch them together by the doorway.
You direct Rafe to her suitcase, and while he picks out an outfit, you head to the kitchen to make her breakfast. To your surprise, everyone is already awake, gathered around the kitchen table, their expressions a mixture of curiosity and amusement.
As you enter, they all stare at you, and Cleo raises an eyebrow with a smirk. “So, did you have a fun night?”
“Yes, since you’re so curious,” you respond, a playful smirk forming on your lips. "Everything was just perfect.” You glance at Rafe, who catches your eye as he walks in, a small grin spreading across his face, and just like that, you can’t help but smile in return, ready to face whatever this day brings together. He keeps his distance from the people he know despises him.
“Don’t worry, we all heard just how perfect it was,” Pope quips under his breath, a teasing smirk gracing his lips. JJ dramatically pretends to gag, while Kie shivers in mock disgust, rolling her eyes as if she can’t bear to hear another word about it. You can’t help but laugh at their antics, their playful teasing only adding warmth to the already cozy morning atmosphere.
With a slight chill hanging in the air, you realize it’s a cooler morning than you expected. You decide to pack up V's breakfast, carefully loading it into a small basket. You grab a few pieces of fresh fruit for yourself and Rafe, wanting to share something light and cheerful to match the serene surroundings. You hand Rafe the basket.
“One second!” you exclaim, rushing back into V's room to grab her warm socks and a little sweater, knowing how much she loves being snug when the mornings get chilly. After all, there’s nothing quite like coziness by the water.
Once you’re all set, you, Rafe, and V head out to the dock, the crisp morning air invigorating. The sun peeks over the horizon, casting golden hues across the water, making it shimmer beautifully. As you settle down on the dock, Rafe sits with V in his lap, his arm wrapped around her, and you feel a rush of affection as the three of you share this moment together.
You spread out the breakfast, placing the basket between you, and begin to share the fruit, passing pieces to one another as you talk and laugh. The conversations flow easily, filled with lighthearted banter and playful teasing. You don’t ever remember a time it was like this with Rafe. V is all giggles as Rafe makes silly faces to keep her entertained, her laughter ringing out like music against the gentle lapping of the water.
“Mmmmmmmm!” V declares holding her tummy, taking a bite of her strawberry that dribbles juice down her chin. Rafe snickers, wiping it away with a thumb, and you catch the tender moment, your heart swelling even more as you watch him interact with her.
“Definitely mmmm V. It’s all about the company, right?” you say, nudging Rafe playfully with your elbow.
“Absolutely,” he replies, his eyes meeting yours, warmth radiating from him. “Can’t think of a better way to start the day.”
As you all share the meal, the combination of laughter, the bright morning sun, and the gentle rhythm of the water creates a perfect atmosphere. You close your eyes for a moment, savoring the feeling of contentment enveloping you. You realize how truly grateful you are for this time—this little family—you’ve built with Rafe and V.
You can feel the teasing glances from your friends back at the house, the energy in the air feeling lighter and more hopeful. There’s something about this morning that feels different, like a fresh start waiting to unfold. And as V giggles at one of Rafe’s silly impressions, you can’t help but smile, knowing that whatever challenges may lie ahead, you’ll face them together, stronger than ever.
You gently break the laughter between the two of them, a playful grin forming on your face as you lean in to V. “Hey, V, do you know who this is?” You point at Rafe, who glances at you, a hint of nervousness flickering across his features.
V looks between the two of you, her face bursting into a smile, though the confusion is evident in her big, bright eyes. “That’s daddy, V,” you encourage her, your heart racing a little as you say it.
“Dada!” she giggles loudly, the sound bright and infectious.
“Can you say ‘dada’ again?” you prompt, your excitement bubbling.
“Dada!” V repeats, her voice cheerful and innocent.
“Who’s that?” you ask again, the anticipation building as you hold her gaze.
“DADA!!” V replies with glee, absolutely beaming throwing herself at Rafe.
Rafe’s expression shifts completely, a wave of emotion washing over him. He’s lost in this moment, his heart swelling with disbelief at her words. Although he knows she doesn’t fully understand the weight of what she’s just said, he’s silently praying it sticks. This is the foundation of what he’s always wanted—a connection, a bond with her. His daughter. It triggers something deep within him, echoing the promise he made to you earlier: to be good for her… and for you.
Unable to contain himself, Rafe leans down, tickling V, who erupts in joyful laughter. He pulls her into a tight hug, holding her close. “Dada!” she cries out again, and at that moment, tears start to roll slowly down Rafe’s cheeks.
You notice the tears glistening in his eyes, and without hesitation, you brush your hand gently against the back of his head, moving in closer to him. You rest your head on his shoulder, feeling the warmth of his emotion as V settles comfortably between his legs, completely at ease.
Seeing Rafe in this light is unlike anything you’ve ever imagined. It's a stark contrast to the way he was shaped by his father, and you can see how drastically he’s changed in such a short time. A daughter he’s only known for a day has already given him so much strength to stay on the straight and narrow. His love for her is palpable—pure, unconditional, overwhelming.
“I really like this feeling,” he murmurs to you, his voice thick with emotion. “Thank you for her.”
You turn to him, meeting his gaze, and without a moment’s thought, you lean in and press a gentle kiss on his lips. The tenderness of the moment wraps around you both, and you share a silent understanding of the depths of what you’re experiencing. This domestic feeling with Rafe is foreign but still feels so natural.
In this moment of warmth and love, you continue to relish every second. It feels like time has stopped, allowing you all to bask in the beauty of this new beginning. You can’t help but feel a sense of hope washing over you, knowing that together, with V at the center of it all, the three of you can build a future that shines with promise.
In the back of Rafe's mind, a deal proposed by Hollis Robinson loomed like a neon sign, beckoning him with promises of substantial financial gain. It was an enticing offer he'd been mulling over for days, stirring up conflicting emotions within him.
He recalled Sofia's hesitation when she first discovered the opportunity, her face etched with concern about the implications of such a choice. What had initially felt like a clear path to a better future now seemed shrouded in moral uncertainty, and Rafe couldn’t help but notice how what he had once envisioned for himself and Sofia was beginning to morph into something meant for you and V. On one hand, the promise of money could provide a sense of security—the kind he wanted desperately to give his daughter. The idea of providing V everything she might need was alluring.
Yet, with every enticing thought of wealth came the heavy weight of its potential consequences. He struggled with the nagging feeling that pursuing that deal could jeopardize what he was beginning to build with you and V, creating an internal conflict that felt almost unbearable. In moments of clarity, he would see how far he’d come and how profoundly he wanted to be better for them both.
But that alluring prospect still tugged at him. Images flashed in his mind of a future where he could give V the best—new clothes, educational opportunities, a safe environment to grow up in. Yet he questioned at what cost it would come. The tug-of-war between the responsibility of being a provider and the darker path that came with Hollis's offer left him feeling unsettled.
He looked down at V, happily nestled between his legs, her laughter ringing like music in the crisp morning air. In that moment, his heart ached with a longing to protect this newfound happiness; every precious moment he shared with you and her felt like a fragile treasure.
Rafe’s gaze drifted toward the water, and uncertainty washed over him. He didn’t want to risk this connection, this fragile happiness he was slowly crafting for you and V. Was the pursuit of money worth potentially losing the life he was starting to build?
He made a silent promise to himself to reflect deeply. Would he be able to resist the allure of Hollis’s deal, or would the desire for security ultimately pull him in? The commitment to be better for his daughter and for you felt stronger than ever, but the specter of temptation still loomed, leaving him unsure of the path he would ultimately take. Instead, for now, he wrapped his arm around you and just enjoyed the moment you’re having.
“I’m gonna figure this out- for all of us. Promise.”
Taglist-
@maybankslover @eringaitskill @luissa266 @lolll505 @dayyzlol @livie4lifestarkeyblyth @calaryssia @leilanizcals @eg-dr3amer3
#drew starkey#drew starkey smut#drew starkey x reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe obx#rafe smut#rafe x reader#rafe x pogue#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe imagine#rafe fic#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe outer banks#rafe x maybank#rafe x y/n
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howd they get married, who proposed, when, and where? what does the fam think of the marraige? what do they think of the whole thing? does bill have a human form and does he use it, and what happened with fiddleford?
sorry if this is too many questions! I just like the new aus coming out and didn't know if you had been asked about many things yet.
when you and ur bf fight:
Sorry for the wait!! This was a big one, it was really fun to answer all of those questions... Also meet my au Stanley :] (she/her). Text under the cut!
Oh boy… That’s a lot of questions!
Well.. I’ll try to answer all of them!
Question 1: How’d they get married? Who proposed, when, and where?
Bill: I proposed first. We were taking a break between universes,
on some crushed altar or something, and i just… decided it was the perfect moment. Best day of my life.
After that we both proposed to fiddleford. Figuring our how to double-propose was… an interesting task, but I’d like to think it went really well (especially with Fiddleford agreeing to both immortality AND marrige in the spot… this guy didn’t even think! Sixer had to ponder for a few months before he accepted immortality)
Question 2: What does the fam think of the marriage? What do they think of the whole thing?
She’s okay with it. Bill redeemed himself in her eyes after the incident (Stanley)
He still doesn’t REALLY trust Bill… But he trusts Ford so he’s coming to terms with the whole thing (Dipper)
She’s SOOOOO excited for the whole thing! Mabel is the one who bonded with Bill the most, so she’s ecstatic to see him happy! (Mabel)
Question 3: Does Bill have a human form?
Nope!
Question 4: What happened to Fiddleford?
Immortal makeover!
#awgust.asks#awgust.art#gravity falls#gravity falls au#starcule au#bill cipher pines#bill cipher#billford#billfiddlesford#fiddauthor#ford squared#dipper pines#dipper and mabel#mabel pines#stanley pines#transfem stanley pines#art#trans artist#fanart#artists on tumblr#ford cipher pines#fiddleford cipher pines
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Single Dad!Eddie x Fem!ReaderSeries
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Summary: Grandma's funeral brings out a side of Ms. Sweetheart that Eddie hasn't ever seen, leaving the two of them questioning everything they've built up together.
Warnings: funeral service (I tried to keep it as neutral as possible so it could apply to any religion), mentions of cause of Grandma's death, failed attempt at sex, pretty much all angst sorry
WC: 5.1k
Chapter 10/20
Divider credit to @saradika Harris's note credit to @girlwiththerubyslippers
Eddie can’t remember the last time he went to a funeral. It might’ve been for one of Wayne’s friends, or a distant great-aunt twice removed. He doesn’t even own a proper suit for such an occasion; everything he’s wearing actually belongs to Wayne. He smooths down the creases in his black slacks; the material of anything other than worn denim is foreign against his legs. The elbows of his coat jacket are patched, and he slides his palms over them in embarrassment.
He takes a seat in one of the back rows, trying to remain as inconspicuous as possible while the other mourners file in. There’s a pit growing in his stomach as his gaze swoops to the coffin resting at the front of the room. The realization that Grandma was inside was almost too much for him to handle, and he’d only met her a month ago. He hadn’t known her when she was…herself, but he saw glimpses of her now and again. The last time he was over for a Wednesday night dinner, she rested her head on his shoulder as though she’d done it a million times. You’d mouthed sorry, but Eddie had simply smiled and let Grandma stay there as long as she wanted. If he was being honest, he felt special, knowing that she was comfortable with him.
Eddie’s eyes are only drawn from the casket when he sees you walk among your family. He immediately takes note of your face, normally soft and vibrant, now stoic and emotionless. It’s a sharp contrast to your relatives, who wear their grief through bloodshot eyes and tear-stained cheeks. The hymn playing in the background fades out as a man speaks up at the podium.
Eddie’s barely listening, keeping his attention on you. He watches your mouth move as you recite the prayers along with the rest of your family, though he’s only half-listening to them. He’s never been one for organized religion, but he echoes the closing statement when everyone else does.
That’s when you stand up, smoothing down your dress at the back of your thighs, and walk towards the front of the room. You’re clutching a piece of paper in your hand, which Eddie notices is slightly trembling. He locks eyes with you, dragging his teeth along his bottom lip and offers the smallest of encouraging smiles. You acknowledge it with a tiny nod in his direction before taking a deep breath and beginning the eulogy.
“Um, h-hi.,” you start, stumbling over your words awkwardly. You clear your throat and try again. “Thank you all for coming to honor and remember Grandma. It’s evident that she meant a lot to so many people.
“When I was writing this eulogy, I kept thinking about who she was as a person.” You don’t let your gaze drift from Eddie’s, and you could swear that he’s the only force keeping you from crumbling to the ground in a heap of grief. “For a lot of us, we wonder what ‘big thing’ will define our lives. The occasion that people will remember us by, you know? But with Grandma, there wasn’t one ‘big thing.’ Her life was a series of little kindnesses that she made sure to sprinkle into her everyday life. Like, when I was a kid, my dad broke his ankle. My mom couldn’t leave me home alone, so Grandma drove him to and from the hospital and stayed with him while he waited. She always took care of us.
“One of my favorite memories is how she would bring me a bouquet of flowers after every dance recital I was in. She’d be waiting for me by the stage door with a big smile on her face, telling me what a great job I did, even if I totally messed up…she was the best. All she wanted was for the people she loved to be happy.
“And that’s what I associate with Grandma—love. How much I loved her, and how much she loved us. Just a few weeks ago, she was sharing Oreos with the kid I tutor, and it reminded me of how she used to be with me.” At that line, Eddie feels his lip quiver, tears dampening his lashes, and he ducks his head to keep you from seeing him break. This time, it’s more for your sake than his, since you’re leaning on him to remain upright. “I encourage all of you to find the little kindnesses in life, and to be the kindness in someone’s day.
“Grandma, you are already so missed. I hope you’re seeing the values you instilled in each of us. Rest easy. We’ll take it from here.” The only sounds in the entire room are the heels of your shoes clacking on the floor and sniffling from nearly everyone else in the congregation. You take your seat quietly, bowing your head as though trying to hide.
The rest of the service is a blur of hymns and prayers; nothing, Eddie notes, nearly as moving as the eulogy you gave. He barely notices when the people around him start moving, keeping a watchful eye on you. You’re trying to blend in amongst your black-clad relatives, but Eddie has no problem finding you. He cranes his neck just in time to see your family make a right through the doors, while you pivot left.
Instinctively, his hands tuck into his pants pocket as he fumbles for his cigarettes and lighter. He has no idea what to say to you, no idea where to even begin. He needs a smoke or three to clear his head before he sees you and stammers out some half-witted acknowledgment of your loss. There’s no time for that; however, because as soon as he steps outside, he sees you sitting on the steps. It’s freezing outside, but your arms are bare, and Eddie can see the prickle of goosebumps lining your skin.
“What are you doing out here by yourself?” he asks, drawing your attention as he takes a seat next to you. He shrugs off his own jacket, placing it over your shoulders without a second thought.
You offer him a sad smile, tugging the coat so it covers more of you. You didn’t realize how cold you were until you felt the contrast of his body heat. “Trying to avoid my family,” you admit, placing your hand over Eddie’s. “Could you take me home? I got a ride here from my uncle, but I really don’t want to go out to eat with everyone.” They’re probably arguing over where to get lunch right now, acting as though their matriarch isn’t about to be lowered into the ground.
“You sure?” Eddie’s eyebrows pinch together in concern. “I mean, I don’t mind, but I don’t want to take you away from them or anything.” He can picture the sneers he’ll receive, a pit forming in his stomach.
You remain unfazed to the conundrum he faces. “Trust me, you’d be doing me a favor. I can’t…” your voice catches, so you restart your sentence. “I can’t sit there while everyone’s smiling and laughing. That’s what happens when an old, sick person dies; people don’t even try to hide their relief. I need…I need to be alone.” You tuck your lips inside your mouth, attempting to bury your feelings.
Eddie nods, reaching over to take his keys out of the jacket you’re now wearing. “Yeah, no, I get it. We can get outta here.” He stands up, takes your hand in his to help you to your feet, and leads you to the car as inconspicuous as possible. The last thing either of you need is to be confronted by one of your relatives.
The two of you sit in the car quietly, without even the radio on. Eddie can’t remember the last time he’s had a silent car ride; he either has music playing, Harris yammering his ear off, or a combination of both. He keeps his hands at ten and two, internally debating whether or not to rest one on your knee. It wouldn’t be a sexual thing, not even close, but he doesn’t want you to get the wrong idea. His grip remains steady, the hum of the engine is the only sound.
You take this time to study him, taking in the crow’s feet that line the edges of his eyes, the tiny patch of stubble that he’d missed while shaving, the slight dimple in his chin. You try and turn before he can catch you, and though your efforts are fruitless, he doesn’t quite call you out on it. “Y’good?”
“Y-Yeah,” you stutter, smoothing a part of your dress that isn’t wrinkled. “Could you come inside for a little while? I thought I wanted to be by myself, but I really want you to stay.”
You really want him to stay. Not just that you need company, but you want him specifically. The notion sets all of Eddie’s nerve endings alight. “‘Course,” he replies, perhaps a bit too casually to cover up his excitement over the realization that he brings you some form of comfort.
When he pulls into the apartment complex’s parking lot and shuts off the ignition, he takes the opportunity to hold your hand again. It’s so much different than when he held it a few days earlier on your date, when there was an atmosphere of joy and hope. Now it’s like he’s pulling you along, like his lead is what has you placing one heel-clad foot in front of the other.
You unlock the door, accidentally leaving the key within its latch, and Eddie quietly removes it and places it on the table. His fingers ghost your biceps to remove your–his–coat from your body, but you just pull it on farther like a safety blanket.
“Y’want coffee? ‘M gonna put on a pot,” you offer quietly, already heading over to the kitchen. You scoop out a serving of coffee grounds for you, inhaling the hazelnut scent before dumping it into the basket, glancing over at him for his response.
“Uh, yeah, sure,” he nods, and you put another scoop in before filling the carafe with tap water. With a flick of the power button, the Black + Decker rumbles and kicks on, and the drip drip drip of coffee fills the room.
You grab two mugs from the cupboard and place them on the counter. “How’d you even find out about the funeral?”
Eddie walks over, though he feels as though he can’t get close enough. He just wants to hold you tight and never let go, but you’ve put up some sort of barrier that he can’t quite interpret. “Oh, um, I asked Byers. I hope you don’t mind–I tried calling you, but it said the line was disconnected.”
Your cheeks burn. “That was Grandma.” Eddie looks confused–rightfully so–and you elaborate. “The morning that she…she got annoyed with the phone ringing, so when I wasn’t looking, she took the scissors and cut the wire.”
Eddie’s jaw drops in disbelief. “You’re joking.”
“I wish I was. I left the house for a few minutes to get a new phone, and when I came back, she’d fallen asleep and…” you swallow thickly, rummaging through the refrigerator for the tiny carton of half-and-half, “…and she never woke up. First call I made with the new phone was to 9-1-1, but it was too late.” Too late. That’s what the EMTs told you: I’m sorry, but it’s too late.
“Oh, Sweetheart. My sweet girl…” Eddie’s heart lurches, and he instinctively reaches out to you. One hand lays between your shoulder blades while the other rubs up and down your spine. He’s careful not to let it drop too low, never going past the small of your back. Though you’re pressed flush to his chest, there’s still a strange disconnect between you.
Despite every urge you have to cling to him, you pull away and shove a teaspoon into the sugar bowl, sliding it towards him on the counter. “S’okay. I mean, it’s not, but…they said she’d had a heart attack. If I didn’t get the phone, I wouldn’t have been able to call for an ambulance anyway.” The dripping of the coffee maker slows as it finishes brewing. “Only thing I could do is go back in time and stop her from cutting the wires, and Melvald’s was all outta time machines,” you joke, but it falls flat.
Eddie frowns, crossing his arms over his chest as he leans against the countertop. “You don’t have to do this, y’know.”
“I’m sorry?”
“Pretend like you’re alright,” he explains, voice hardly louder than a whisper. He tucks a lock of hair behind his ear.
You feel an anger rising within you, though you’re unable to pinpoint its origin. “I am alright,” you insist through gritted teeth.
Eddie shakes his head, peering at you through his impossibly long eyelashes. “It’s okay to be sad–”
“Don’t you get it, Eddie?” You cut him off with a snap, slamming the coffee pot down so harshly that it almost cracks. “I’m not sad. I’m not relieved. I’m not anything. My grandma just died, and I don’t feel a goddamn thing! It’s like I’m some kind of monster.”
“Hey, hey, c’mere.” He hugs you again, holds you even tighter than before as he kisses the top of your head. “You’re not a monster, ‘kay? I promise you.”
You look up at him, not quite believing his words, but you press your lips to his. He kisses you back gently; timidly even, but you deepen it and graze his tongue with your own. Your left hand weaves its way through his messy curls and your right fumbles with his belt buckle, but you’re unable to unhook the clasp before he steps back.
“What’re you–” His eyes widen and he puts his hands up to avoid touching you, clearly confused by your behavior. If you had the capacity to be honest with yourself, you’d admit that you’re not sure why you’re doing this, either.
“Please, Eddie,” you beg, trying to reconnect your lips with his, but he just pulls away again. “Please, I…I need this. I need you.”
“If we sleep together for the first time right now, while you’re like this, you’ll regret it,” he says.
You don’t deny the accusation; instead, you double down on it. “Okay, so I’ll regret it! I’ll feel regret, but at least I’ll feel something!” Your trembling fingers brush against his shirt, trying to grab onto it and bring his body to you, but he turns with a scoff.
“You’d really be okay with that?” There’s unmistakeable anger in his tone, but it’s laced with something more than that; something that sounds more like hurt. “Regretting our first time together?”
“Didn’t we almost fuck on your couch the night we met? You didn’t even know my last name. You barely knew my first name.” Your words are biting, thick with malice. “When did you become so averse to meaningless sex?”
“Meaningless?” Eddie balks, digging his fingernails into his palms until they leave crescent-shaped marks. His lips contort into a perplexed grimace as he formulates a response. “I, um, I gotta go. I’ll call you–”
“Yeah, I’ve heard that line before, and I’m not falling for it again.” You can’t stop the words before they’re tumbling from your mouth, and you can’t take them back. “Shit, Eddie–”
“Just—don’t say anything else, ‘kay? I’m leaving.” He turns around, digging into his back pocket. “This is for you. From me and Harris.” He tosses a piece of notebook paper, folded into fourths, onto the end table and closes the door with a slam.
You stand there, dumbfounded at what just occurred–mostly at your own actions. When you move towards the paper, you realize that you’re still wearing Eddie’s suit jacket, and you yank it off and throw it to the ground, leaving it in a heap. You open the note and read, vision blurred from the tears threatening to spill over.
The innocent kindness of a little boy is all it takes for you to break down and cry, muffling your sobs in your palms though there isn’t anyone around to hear them. Grandma was gone. You’d chased Eddie away with the same vitriol he’d spewed at you that day at the record store. You’re really, truly alone.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” you chant to no one in particular. You’re sorry to Grandma, for leaving her home alone. You could’ve asked Jess to run out and get a new phone, but you’d needed a break from Grandma’s anger that was always directed towards you. That morning, after you’d discovered the cut phone line, there had been another argument over taking her medication, and she yelled “I HATE YOU!” at the top of her lungs. Then she sat at the table and ate a bowl of cereal like nothing had happened. Instead of taking a deep breath and brushing it off, you’d grabbed your keys and headed to RadioShack. You could’ve driven there, it would’ve made the trip much faster, but you’d decided to walk. The fresh air would do you good, you told yourself, pushing away the full truth of the matter: you’d desperately needed to be away from Grandma. When you got back, she was laying on the couch, and you would’ve sworn she was only sleeping…
You’re sorry to Eddie. Sorry that he’d wasted his time with someone who resorted to dredging up the past as soon as she felt an ounce of anger and rejection. Someone who insisted that he could trust her and then promptly shattered that rapport once he’d let his guard down.
And for a split second, you allow yourself to feel sorry for you. Sorry that you couldn’t even grieve properly without feeling like you didn’t deserve it, because if you were home, Grandma might still be alive.
You look down at the card one more time, choking out a laugh through your tears at Harris’s offer to share his grandpa. It dawns on you that you’ll either have to stop tutoring him or continue to see Eddie on a weekly basis. Everyone who comes in contact with me gets entangled in my problems, you note miserably. Eddie’s finally getting his life together and I’m fucking it all up. He deserves better than me.
Maybe it’s a good idea to leave Hawkins and go back home, at least for the holidays. You’re not sure what type of celebrations the family will muster up, but it’s better than being alone with your thoughts. And if you never return, that might be best for everybody.
The bell above the drugstore door chimes as Eddie pushes his way in. He smoked out his remaining cigarettes on the drive over, and he’s desperate for another pack. He makes a beeline for the back wall, plucking his usual Camels from the display. “Perfect,” he mutters, though his lungs would certainly disagree.
As he shuffles towards the cashier, he spots a familiar face in one of the aisles. His lurking cowardice screams at him to run away, but he shoves it deep down and talks anyway. “H-Hey, man. How’s it going?”
Jeff turns around, first bewildered at who’s speaking to him, then tensing up when he sees Eddie standing before him. “Can’t complain. Just getting some of these prenatal vitamin things for Viv,” he replies tersely, shaking the bottle to emphasize his statement.
There’s an awkward silence before Eddie speaks again. “Look, um, I’m really sorry about what happened at our last show.” He rubs the back of his neck and winces at the memory. “What I said, what I didn’t say…you’re gonna be a great dad, dude. Like, the best. I was just jealous, but that’s not an excuse to be an asshole.”
“Jealous?” Jeff cocks an eyebrow incredulously, willing Eddie to continue.
“Yeah,” Eddie nods, shamefully averting his gaze. “You’re bringing a kid into a stable household, and I couldn’t do that for Harris. I don’t regret having him, of course, but I’ll always feel guilty about the shitshow he was born into.” He taps the pack of cigarettes on his palm, biting his lower lip to shut himself up. “Anyway, I gotta get home—”
“Eddie Munson?” He turns around to see a young woman standing behind him. Her low-cut top shows off the top of her breasts, cleavage pushed up by a bra, and her jeans hug every curve. She purses her pink-glossed lips together in a flirtatious smile.
“Y-Yeah?”
“I’m Lisa.” She says this like Eddie should already know this, and he’s embarrassed to admit to himself that he can’t place the name or face. “We hooked up last summer at the Hideout? In the men’s room?” Lisa lowers her voice seductively to whisper that detail. “I haven’t seen you there in a while.”
“Oh, yeah.” There have been multiple men’s room hook-ups, but he’s not about to play detective to figure out exactly who she is, so he plays along. “The band’s been on a bit of a…hiatus, I guess.” From his peripheral vision, he can see Jeff ducking his head, and his cheeks burn with the truth.
Lisa juts out her lower lip in an exaggerated pout, though Eddie knows it’s all for show. “That’s too bad.” She lets her hand rest on his chest, leaning into him and twirling a strand of his hair around a polished fingernail. “If you’re not busy tonight, I’d love to have you over for drinks and…dessert? Recreate that night at the bar, minus the urinal?”
Eddie moves her arms from his vicinity, putting a necessary space between them. “Um, n-nah. No thanks,” he clarifies. “I’m, uh, kinda involved with someone, so…”
She remains undaunted, a small chuckle escaping her throat. “I can keep a secret. She doesn’t have to know.” She takes another step forward to close the gap, and he’s so goddamn tempted, but he shakes it off. He doesn’t have a clue what’s going to happen between you and him, but he knows he’s not going to sabotage any potential relationship.
“Well, I’ll know,” he retorts, “and I’ll feel like shit about it.”
Lisa rolls her eyes. “Whatever. Your loss.” She pivots on one heel and mumbles something under her breath that Eddie doesn’t even bother to interpret.
Jeff looks at Eddie with an amused grin as he shifts his weight from one side to the other. “So, you’re involved with someone?” He knows from what Jess has told him that Eddie went on a date with you a few days ago, but he couldn’t gauge the seriousness of the situation.
“I think so. At least, I was, until about fifteen minutes ago.” He relents and fills Jeff in about everything that happened, from your conversation over steaming coffee mugs, to the amazing kiss you’d shared as snowflakes collected on your eyelashes, to the unexpected confrontation after Grandma’s funeral today.
Jeff sighs, but it’s one of sympathy, not exasperation. “You did the right thing,” he says finally.
“I don’t think anyone’s ever said that to me.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Jeff laughs, punching him playfully on the arm. “I’m serious. And you did the right thing just now, too, with that groupie.” He clears his throat. “Viv’s baby shower is in a couple weeks. Ladies only, y’know, but I could use some help loading all the gifts into the car. And we could grab some lunch beforehand, if you want.”
Eddie nods. “Yeah, that would be great. Might have to let Harris tag along, if that’s all right.” He doesn’t want to keep asking Wayne to babysit, no matter how much the old man insists that he doesn’t mind.
“Of course. You know that little man is always welcome.” Jeff says, walking towards the register. “I’ll call you with the details.”
Eddie hesitates, letting his friend pass him by a few paces before he calls out. “Jeff?”
“Yeah?”
“What do I do about…” Eddie trails off, unwilling to finish his sentence. He feels absolutely ridiculous having this conversation in the middle of the drugstore, but he’s desperate not to fuck this up further.
Jeff scratches at his stubble with his free hand, contemplating the options as only someone who’s been in a long-term relationship and hasn’t had to navigate the nuances of a fresh relationship in ages can. “Give her some time; a few days, at least. She’s going through a lot. She needs her space, y’know, to figure things out.”
It’s not the answer Eddie was hoping for; patience has never been his forte. He wishes that Jeff would have told him to chase after you, to go get the girl and make sure she knows how much she means to him. But he knows that his friend is right, and he acknowledges his response with a small smile. “Thanks, man.”
“See ya around, Ed.”
Eddie unlocks his apartment door, new pack of cigarettes in one hand and a pint of Ben & Jerry’s tucked under the other arm. He doesn’t usually splurge on ice cream, but every romantic comedy cliche has instructed him that it’s the perfect remedy for heartbreak. If that’s even what this is, he thinks, but he knows it’s true. After doing everything in his power to prevent it, he’d allowed you to break his heart. And as he shoves a spoon into the container of Devil’s Food Chocolate, it dawns on him that he’d do it all again.
He’d come to your rescue and pick the lock of Grandma’s bedroom door. He’d sit around the table and eat pizza with you, Harris, and Grandma every Wednesday night. He’d drive to your house with store-brand cookies and watch cheesy Thanksgiving movies with you just to see the smile on your face. He’d take you out for coffee and kiss you in the snow a thousand times over. And he’d go to Grandma’s funeral and drive you home and turn down your offer for sex and break his own fucking heart again and again if it meant protecting you.
He shimmies out of his starchy dress pants and unbuttons his shirt, leaving himself in just a white undershirt and his boxers as he sinks deeper into the sofa. He reaches over for the remote–now that he works when Harris is in school, he rarely has time to watch something that he actually enjoys–and notices the phone’s red flashing light indicating that he has a new voicemail.
He presses play with a clumsy finger on the button, expecting Wayne’s gruff voice or a reminder for an overdue bill. When he hears that it’s you, he sits up straight, nearly dropping his ice cream.
“Hi, Eddie. It’s me. I’m so sorry for what happened earlier. I’m sure you’re probably mad, but I just want you to know…it wouldn’t have been meaningless. It wasn’t meaningless the night we met when it was supposed to be meaningless.” You take a deep breath. “I’m going back home for the holidays. Um, I’m not sure when…if…I’m coming back, but before I leave, I had to apologize for what I said. You’re a great guy, Eddie. I hope you know that. Have, um, have a nice holiday. Okay, bye.”
Eddie remains still, a loud silence enveloping the room once the machine relays that he’s reached the end of new messages. He’s dissecting every word you’d uttered, replaying them over and over.
It wasn’t meaningless the night we met when it was supposed to be meaningless.
So you’d felt it, too; that spark much stronger than the usual lust that overcomes him during hookups. And while he’d tried to convince himself that he’d only asked you to cuddle, had you stay over out of post-sex, post-show delirium, he can’t deny the truth any longer.
He’d asked because he felt comfortable around you, like he could hold you forever and whisper secrets that scare him to even admit to himself. Maybe it was because you’d seen Harris’s car seat that night and hadn’t run for the hills, or maybe it was the way you’d kissed him like he was worth savoring. And the morning after, when he’d all but chased you out of the apartment…Christ, you didn’t deserve that.
I’m not sure when…if…I’m coming back.
The ‘when’ he could handle, but that ‘if’ was a weight on his chest. He questions his actions for a moment–should he have slept with you? Showed you how wanted and cherished and safe you were with him? Given your mind a chance to wander from the grief choking it? But Jeff said he had done the right thing, and considering the man was engaged with a baby on the way, Eddie figured he had to know something about women.
You’re a great guy, Eddie. I hope you know that.
Is he? He’s certainly a better man than when you’d first met him, but is he actually a great guy? He’d bought you coffee and didn’t fuck you when you were too vulnerable to truly consent–is that what constitutes greatness, or is he just a step above a piece of shit?
And, of course, part of him is angry. Not only because you were so easily willing to use him–although that realization definitely stings–but mostly because you’d thought he’d want to. After everything you two had been through, did you truly believe that he’d be unbothered? That he’d throw away all of that progress just to get his dick wet? Is that how little you think of him? Eddie doesn’t want the answer.
The ice cream is melting, so he forgoes the spoon and just takes a swig from the pint. He licks the chocolatey residue from his lips before standing up to put the carton in the freezer. Tacked onto the refrigerator is Harris’s picture from Halloween where Eddie and Ms. Sweetheart are holding hands.
He plucks it from under the magnet, staring at it intently. The memory of his son and his uncle asking him about you, that pretty like a princess remark, the unfurling realization that he felt things for you that he’d thought he was incapable of feeling. He never should have taken their ribbings, inadvertently getting his hopes up that there was something there worth pursuing.
Without thinking, Eddie crumples the paper in his fist, crushing the family portrait into a ball. “Shit,” he mutters, placing it on the table and smoothing it out as best as he can. His hands glide over the drawing, rubbing over every crease until it looks good as new and Harris will be none the wiser.
But Eddie knows what’s been destroyed. What he doesn’t know is whether or not it can be smoothed out.
--
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First Time Fears 18+
Request: Could you do a request for Will Halstead where the reader is nervous about sleeping with him since she's still a virgin if that's okay with you
Pairings: Will Halstead x Reader
Warnings: fluff, angst, smut
Masterlist
A/N: thank you @bellarkeselection for requesting it. I love Will and wish he got more love.
A/N 2: @talesofreading and @imagine-all-the-fandoms prepare yourself it's a steamy one.
It's funny how fear can stop you from doing things that you really want. For example, you want to sleep with your boyfriend, Will Halstead, but the fact that you are a virgin and scared to get too intimate with him has stopped you. Stopped you every time. You're so self-conscious about it that whenever it gets brought up or you get to that point you close up and run away. You hated that you got this way. Will is a lovely boyfriend. He takes care of you when you're sick or just had a bad day. He cooks most of the time, you cook too but it’s not as good as his even if he goes on a health kick. It didn’t help that you worked with his brother and he kept asking how your relationship was with Will, it was lovely you had nothing to worry about but it tends to freeze when it comes to intimacy. You met Will when you and Jay Halstead, Will’s brother, had gone to the hospital to question a witness that had been brought in after an attack. When you both looked at each other you both knew it was love at first sight, from that day on you both exchanged numbers and began talking and about 4 months of talking and him taking you on dates he asked you to be his girlfriend and you said yes.
Currently you were out with your friends that you had come to grow and love when you moved to Chicago 8 years ago. You 3 had been chatting nonstop about everything and then it came to the topic of sex. Audrey was married to an accountant, Samantha was engaged to a teacher, and Jenna had a mechanic boyfriend and of course there was you who had a doctor boyfriend, everyone was jealous of you since you had a doctor as a boyfriend. “Oh my gosh Josh and I had the best sex last night.” Audrey said.
“Oh, do tell.” Samantha said, propping her elbows up and sipping her coffee.
“He tried this new thing with his tongue and oh my gosh it had me seeing stars.” Audrey said as the others leaned forward to listen but you sat back and became quiet.
“Did you do anything to return the favor?” Jenna asked
“Oh, you know it.” Audrey said and now you were hoping for a phone call to be called into work not wanting to spend another second talking about sex life. You wanted to have sex with Will but you were afraid, afraid that something would go wrong and that it would hurt. You knew it would hurt some but after reading people’s experience online and some said that they didn't recover for a month you got scared and clammed up. “So, what about you and Will?” Audrey asked and you were so out of it that you didn’t even hear your name.
“Huh?” You asked
“I asked how your and Will’s sex life was.” She said and everyone was now looking at you and suddenly you became self-conscious.
“We haven’t had any sex yet.” You said and they all gasped.
“Are you two, ok? You’ve been together for 7 months?” Samantha asked
“It’ll be 8 months this Wednesday. We’re good, everything is great. We’ve both been so busy. Me working a huge case and him having multiple night shifts we just haven’t found the time.” You said even though most of it was a lie but also the truth. You weren’t going to tell them you’re a virgin nobody knew except your doctor. There is nothing wrong with wanting to wait or being a virgin but it doesn't help your self-consciousness any. Before they could even answer your phone was buzzing and you grabbed it and it was Jay telling you that you needed to come in. “I’m sorry to cut this short but I have to go to work.” You said and everyone protested. “Hey, someone has to keep this city safe.” You said chuckling.
“Fine, you get a pass. Now go and keep our asses safe.” Jenna said and you chuckled and got up and placed some money down for your share.
“I’ll text you all later. Bye!” You said as you put on your coat because of course it was snowing.
“You better or I’m hunting you down.” Samantha said and everyone chuckled but agreed.
“I will.” You said
“Good now shoo.” She said and you smiled and hugged them and then you were out the door. You pulled out your phone and called Jay.
“You saved my ass.” You said when he answered and he chuckled.
“You’re welcome. You on your way?” He asked as you got to your car.
“Yup, just got into my car.” You said as you opened your door and got in and shut it. You got your keys and turned the car on and was met with the heat.
“Good. Be safe getting here. Roads are slick.” He said and you smiled.
“I will be. See you in a second.” You said
“See you.” He said and then you both hung up the phone.
You pulled out of the parking lot and headed off towards the precinct. You slid a few times but nothing to cause you to lose absolute control of your vehicle. When you arrived in the parking lot you sighed and stayed there for a minute and then your phone was ringing and you were quick to find it and look at the name and you smiled when you saw that Will was calling you.
“Hey, Babe.” You said smiling.
“Hey, Baby. Are you still out with your friends?” He asked and you could hear rustling around in the background and you wondered what he was doing.
“No, Jay called and said I needed to come into work. What are you doing?” You asked, curiosity getting the better of you.
“I am getting stuff to make for dinner tonight. I was calling to see if you needed or wanted anything specific. Are you going to be home tonight?” He asked
“I’m hoping so. As for anything I need, I can’t think of anything so you’re good there.” You said
“Sounds good. Be safe please. I don’t want you getting hurt anytime soon.” He said and you chuckled.
“Noted, Dr. Halstead.” You said knowing it drove him crazy when you called him that sometimes.
“Behave yourself.” He said and you chuckled.
“I love you. See you at home.” You said
“I love you too.” He said and then you both were hanging up.
You sighed but now you were in a better mood. You got out of your car and headed up to the steps of the precinct. An officer was quick to open it for you “Thank you.” You said to him and he smiled.
“No problem, Detective Y/L/N.” He said and then you both were quickly parting ways. You looked up and saw Trudy standing at her desk.
“Let me guess you got called in with the rest of them.” She said and you nodded.
“Looks to be that way.” You said “It was supposed to be my day off but crime never sleeps it seems.” You said chuckling and she chuckled too.
“Never. I’ll buzz you up.” She said and you smiled and nodded and walked to the gate as it made a buzzing noise and you were able to turn the knob and pull it open.
“I can’t wait for them to put a keypad in.” You said
“Me and you both.” She said as the door closed behind you and you ascended up the stair where you were met face to face with Jay.
“Took your sweet ass time.” He said and you rolled your eyes.
“Sorry, I was talking with your brother.” You said and he chuckled.
“So, how was the brunch with your friends?” He asked as you stepped onto the floor of the bullpen.
“They started talking about their sex life. So, you really did save my ass.” You said and he chuckled.
“Sooo, how is it?” He asked, smirking and you hit his arm.
“That is none of your business.” You said glaring at him.
“I’m kidding. I’m kidding. I don’t want to know how my brother is in bed.” He said and walked away. If he only knew that you and Will haven’t had sex because of your own silly, to you, fear he would’ve laughed in your face. You went to your desk and took off your coat. You had your gun and badge on your hip, you put them there when you got ready to come into the precinct. You were just hoping whatever you needed to be called in for went by quickly so that you could get back to you loving boyfriend and maybe someday your fiancée. As you took a seat and started your computer and booted it up you looked up at Jay at his desk.
“So, what are we doing here?” You asked. Everyone had been working on a drug bust but activity seemed to have died down so it was put on hold.
“The huge drug bust we were working on has new activity like major activity. We also got new information about it so it’s all hands-on deck again.” He said while looking at you.
“Is there any chance that we are going home tonight?” You asked
“I’m hoping so.” He replied and then Hank Voight walked in and everybody looked up at him.
“Alright everyone gather around!” He said and everyone did. “We just got word that a drop will be happening in 30 minutes. We need to get there before it happens. Jay and Y/N I want you to take the front, Adam and Kim, I want you to take the side, Antonio and Kevin take the other side. Alvin and I will take up the rear.” He said and everyone nodded.
“Yes sir.” Everyone said in unison and headed out. As you got into the truck with Jay and put on your vest quickly as did, he, he started to drive to the location. The truck was filled with small talk until he pulled up to the spot but stayed out of view.
“You know what sounds nice right now?” You asked
“What?” He asked
“My nice warm bed.” You said and he chuckled.
“Cuddled up with my brother.” He asked and you hit him on his arm. “Am I wrong?” He asked, chuckling and you waited a beat.
“No. You're not wrong.” You said and he chuckled “Hey, I think it's about to go down.” You said and pointed to the scene in front of you. “Call it in. I'm going ahead.” You said as you got out and slowly and quietly closed the door. Jay was quick to call it in and then he was following you to your crouched position.
“On my command.” Hank said through the radio.
You waited and waited until it finally went down and he gave the command everyone moved in. “Chicago PD!” Was yelled throughout the group and the criminals put their hands up and everyone was arrested. 20 people in total were arrested and several pounds of drugs were confiscated. Overall, it was a great bust. Everyone high-fived each other. You were just glad no shots were fired and nobody got hurt. Soon everyone was heading back to the precinct and doing paperwork and finally around 8:00 PM you were heading home.
“Finally! I’m escaping while I can.” You said as you were putting on your coat and everyone chuckled.
“Go. Get. Before you’re stuck here. Tell Will I said hi.” Jay said and you smiled.
“I will.” You said and started to walk out of the bullpen and down the stairs you opened the gate and smiled at Trudy. “See you later.” You said and she actually smiled.
“See you later.” She said and then you were out the door and heading to your car as you were doing so you pulled out your phone and called Will.
“Hello, Gorgeous.” His voice came through.
“Hello, Handsome.” You said and he chuckled “I’ll be happy to report that we were successful on the drug bust and I’m heading home.” You said while getting into your car after you unlocked it.
“Good. I can’t wait to see you. I’ll get dinner started.” He said
“Awww, Will. You don’t have to do that. I’m fine with leftovers.” You said
“Not acceptable. My girl needs a meal for a job well done.” He said
“There is no changing your mind is there?” You asked
“Nope. Now get home safely.” He said and you chuckled.
“I will. I love you.” You said
“I love you too. See you soon.” He said
“Very soon.” You said and then you were hanging up the phone and driving out of the precinct and onto the main road and to your shared home. Maybe tonight you’ll get over your fear and finally have sex with your amazing boyfriend.
20 minutes later and you were pulling up to your shared apartment and parking beside his car. You shut the engine off and got out locking it. Bitter cold slapped you in the face and you quickly walked into the building and the elevator and pressed the button. It opened and you got in and pressed the button for your floor. The doors shut and it quickly took you to your floor which luckily was the 2nd floor. You got out and walked to your door and unlocked it and the smell of your favorite meal hit you. “Welcome home.” Will said as he met you at the door and kissed you and helped you out of your coat.
“It smells delicious in here.” You said and he smiled and he chuckled.
“Only the best for my girl.” He said and kissed you until you were breathless until he pulled away when the oven beeped.
“Oh, your brother said hi.” You said and he chuckled and shook his head.
“Go and change. I’ll have dinner on the table by the time you are out.” He said and you smiled at him. He was truly too good to you.
“How did I get so lucky to have you?” You asked before taking off to your bedroom.
“I ask that to myself about you. I’m just glad you stumbled into my ER with a concussion and a gunshot wound with my brother right behind you.” He said and you smiled.
“Though I’m not happy how that situation came to be, I’m glad it led me to you.” You said and then you were heading to get changed and put your gun and badge in the safe and once you were changed and walking out, he had food and drinks on the table. He pulled the chair out for you and when you set down, he pushed you in and then he sat down in his chair. You took a bite and practically moaned and closed your eyes so you didn’t see Will having to adjust his seating or look at you with the most love someone could have for their partner. “This is delicious.” You said after swallowing and opening your eyes smiling.
“I’m glad you love it.” He said smiling and he took a bite of his. The rest of dinner was eaten in silence but he still had a problem especially with all the moaning you were making. Finally, dinner was done and you leaned back in your chair. You suddenly got up and walked over to him and he turned and you sat on his lap and brought him for the sweetest kiss ever and he kissed back. You could feel his boner and you deepened the kiss. You both kissed each other furiously until you both needed air and you looked each other in the eye as you both panted. You wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned your forehead on his.
“Let’s take this into the bedroom.” You said and smiled and gently got up with you in his arms and started to walk towards the bedroom. “I love you.” You said and he smiled.
“I love you too.” He replied as he gently laid you on the bed and got on top of you. He brought his lips to the side of your neck and you turned your head for him to get a better access. He kissed it slowly and passionately, occasionally nipping and then soothing it with his tongue, it made you moan and clutch onto the bedding.
“Mmmm Will.” You moaned out and he smirked against your neck. His hands went to the hem of your shirt and he momentarily looked up at you and you nodded giving him permission. He pulled your shirt up your body and over your head. He tossed it somewhere as you laid topless in your bra, you started to get nervous. Will started to kiss down your chest and down the valley of your breasts and down to your naval. He got to your jeans. “Stop.” You said but he must’ve not heard you “Will, please stop.” You said louder and pushed on his shoulders and he did and looked up at you sitting up slightly.
“What? What’s wrong?” He asked
“I can’t do this.” You said and he sighed.
“What is going on? This isn’t the first time you have done this.” He asked
“I’m…I’m a virgin.” You said quietly and embarrassed and you expected him to be disgusted and be done with you, you expected him to laugh but when you didn’t hear him leave or laugh you looked up at him.
“There is nothing wrong with that.” He said and you sighed.
“I know but it’s embarrassing.” You said and shook his head.
“There is nothing to be embarrassed about. We can stop if you want.” He said and you shook your head.
“No, I want to lose it. I want to lose it to you.” You said and he smiled.
“I would be honored being your first time. We can take this at your pace.” He said and you nodded as he started to stroke your sides lovingly and tenderly.
“Please be gentle.” You pleaded and smiled and leaned up to kiss your lips.
“I promise.” He said against your lips and you nodded and he leaned back and took off his shirt showing his ripped body and his amazing abs. You leaned up and touched them and felt them flex underneath your touch. “Like what you see?” He asked, smirking, this wasn’t the first time you’ve seen him shirtless but each time it took your breath away you never expected a doctor to be so ripped.
“Absolutely.” You said and he chuckled and then started to unbuckle his belt and undo his pants. You watched him practically drooling and almost whined when he got off the bed but when you saw him pushing his pants and underwear down to release his leaking angry red cock you kept quiet. You’ve seen his cock before; you’ve given him plenty of blowjobs so seeing it was no surprise. He got back up on the bed and reached behind you as you lifted up so he could undo your bra and slide it off of you, when you were exposed to him you quickly tried to cover up but he stopped you.
“You have nothing to be shy about. It’s me.” He said and you nodded and he continued to unbutton your pants and undo the zipper and pulled them down along with your underwear and off of you. Now you were truly exposed to him and he was fully exposed to you. “You’re so beautiful.” He said and you blushed and turned away. “You still, ok?” He asked and you nodded “I need a verbal answer, Baby.” He said.
“I’m ok. Please don’t stop.” You said and he smiled and nodded and leaned down and kissed your lips and you kissed back. His hand traveled down your body until it got to where you needed him the most. His other hand was by your head stroking your hair. He touched your clit and you jumped.
“Shhh, I got you.” He said against your lips as he started to circle it, rubbing it, and pulling on it. You started to feel good and started to let out moans into his mouth. He then slid his hand through your folds and down to your entrance and he started to put a finger and you tensed up and he stopped when he felt it. “Hey, it is ok. I got you. We can stop if you want. Just say the word.” He said and you shook your head.
“No, no. Keep going.” You said and he nodded and watched your face as he slid his finger in further until he felt resistance and your breath caught in your throat. He stopped and you nodded and he slowly slid a finger into you and it felt weird and he stayed there for a minute until you nodded and he started to move it back and forth the pain went away and pleasure started to take over and you moaned. Just as you were about to cum, he pulled out gently. “Hey!” You said looking at him glaring and he chuckled.
“I wanna taste you. I want you to cum on my face.” He said as he slid down to come face to face with your slick folds. You were about to say something but he licked a broad stripe of up your folds and you moaned loudly. This was the first time he had ever gone down on you and you wonder why you never let him do it before. It was magical. Your hands went to his red curly hair and gripped it. He ate you out like you were his last meal. You would have closed your thighs around his head but his broad shoulders were keeping them open.
“Fuck, Will!” You moaned and that caused him to go faster and started to tongue fuck you and occasionally he would come up and give you clit attention biting, swirling, and sucking on it. You were close and you started to clench around nothing. “Fuck, I’m close! I’m close!” You moaned out and then he was speeding up his efforts until that knot in your stomach exploded and you were cumming on his face and he was lapping it all up like a dog would water on a hot day. Your grip on his hair tightened as he lapped up your juices through your high. When you did come down from your high and sat up making you let go of his hair. “Fuck, Will. That was so good.” You said and he smiled and you could see your slick covering his chin. “Why I haven’t let you do that until now is beyond me.” You said and he chuckled again.
“I will always make you feel good and make you cum. You don’t have to worry about that.” He said and he smiled.
“I know.” You said and then he leaned forward and kissed you. You could taste yourself on his tongue as he French kissed you. You had to admit you tasted sweet. You both broke the kiss when air was needed.
“Are you ready?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yes.” You said and he grabbed his angry hard thick cock and positioned it at your entrance. He ran his cock up and down your folds and then slowly pushed into your entrance and when you felt it hit that resistance you tensed and he stopped.
“We’re taking it at your pace.” He said
“I’m ok. Go on.” You said and he nodded and rocked forward until he pushed all the way in and you felt a snap and you tensed up. Once he bottomed out, he stayed there. He watched tears fall from your eyes and he was quick to wipe them away.
“Hey, shhhh. It’s ok. I got you. It’ll only hurt for a few minutes but I need to start moving, ok?” He asked and you nodded.
“Ok.” You said quietly sniffling. He nodded and started to rock his hips and pain shot through your body but as he started moving more the pain turned into pleasure and you started to moan.
“I got you.” He said once you got comfortable with it and you wanted him to go faster.
“Faster.” You said
“You sure?” He asked and you nodded.
“Positive.” You said and he obeyed and started to move faster he caged your head in with his arms and his mouth went to your neck.
“Fuck! Squeezing me so tight!” He moaned and your hands went to his shoulders, fingernails digging into them. “So perfect!” He moaned and you moaned with him and panted.
“So big. Making me so full.” You moaned as you threw your head back and to the side and your nails dug into him more and hissed but he loved it. “I love you so much.” You moaned again.
“I love you too.” He replied and then his lips were on your left nipple and that had you letting out a pornographic moan.
“Fuck me!” You moaned as he swirled and licked your nipple. He didn’t stop there as he nipped and tugged on it. Just that alone was bringing you close to the edge and quickly. “Fuck, don’t stop! I’m close!” You said and then he was pulling off your left nipple and giving the right nipple the same attention. During all of that your nails had started to go down his back leaving scratch marks but he wasn’t complaining. Once he felt that your right nipple had enough attention, he pulled off of it and looked at you’re in-awe expression.
“I can’t wait to marry you and fill you with children to watch these-” He started and cupped your breasts “swell.” He said and that had you moaning and closer to cumming. “Cum with me.” He said and released your breasts and brought one hand to your clit and started to rub it and play with it. You could tell he was close by him starting to stagger in his thrusts and you started to squeeze him “That’s right squeeze me. Cum with me. I’m close.” He said and you nodded.
“Me too. Let’s start making a baby now. I want to mother your kids and I don’t want to wait. I’m not on birth control.” You said and that all too familiar knot was back and it was about to snap. That seemed to spur him on because with one last tug on your clit you were cumming hard and then he was too. You both came with loud moans as he painted your walls white. “Fuck.” You said as you started to come down from your high.
“You’re amazing. I can’t wait to have kids with you and be your husband.” He said as he was coming down too. Once you both were blissed out, he slowly pulled out of you and you could feel his cum trickle out of you and you jumped from overstimulation when he pushed it back in. Once it was all back in, he laid on the other side of you. “Were you serious when you said you weren’t on birth control?” He asked and you nodded.
“I haven’t been on it for a while. It was screwing a lot of things up with me.” You said turning to look at him and he slipped an arm under you and pulled you into him.
“Thank you for letting me be your first.” He whispered
“I knew from the very moment we started dating I wanted you to take my virginity. I always got scared when we started to get very intimate and that I would be hurting for months from what I’ve read.” You said and he gave you a look. “I know I know. I shouldn’t haven’t looked it up. I couldn’t help myself.” You said and he chuckled.
“I would never ever hurt you. Ever. I love you too much to do so.” He said and you nodded and smiled.
“I know and I love you too. It was amazing by the way.” You said as you cuddled into him and he started to throw the covers over you.
“Only the best for my girl.” He said and kissed the top of your head. That’s how you spent the rest of the night. In his arms with nothing to worry about. The smell of his cologne and the scent of sex was lulling you to sleep. Your eyes finally slipped closed and breath evened out. Once Will felt your breath even out, he kissed your head one more time and he finally allowed himself to fall asleep. Both not knowing that one of his strong swimmers had made contact with an egg and life was being created inside you.
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a/n: finally finished this after being left such an essay about dad!price by @connorsui that made me want to cry with joy that someone liked my silly rambling that much so now have dad!johnny
part 1: simon here
part 2: price here
part 4: gaz here
masterlist here
buy me a ko-fi
warnings: pregnancy
word count: 1.7k
Soap has always told you that he wanted a house full of babies with you and will not take no for an answer
You rolled your eyes everytime thinking he's exaggerating but he never was.
He tells you so during your romps “Gannae pump you full of babies, mama” With any other man it would ruin the moment but the way soap snarls it out sends heat spiraling through you and having you begging him to cum inside. He’ll wear the condom if you ask him to, but he won’t bring it out on his own volition. He knows you’re the person he wants to build a family with, has known since the first date when you rolled your eyes at all his corny jokes and groaned in mock pain.
Soap will not heed doctor’s advice and tries to palm at you before you’re ready, not even caring when you whine about things not being tight and firm like they used to be
“You’re positively bonnie lass, even more now that I know those stretch marks came from our baby that you carried for me.”
Feral for a man who calls me mama
Soap will absolutely come up behind you and grab at your flesh every time you put the baby down for a nap, “Cannae help myself lass,” he’d pant as he’s rutting against you, a man possessed, “You’ve been teasing me all day!” Even though you don’t recall doing so
You’d been taking care of the baby all morning and hadn’t paid much mind to your hyper husband as he flitted around doting on you and the little one. Little did you know that’s what he meant. Seeing you be such a good mom and a mom to HIS baby had gotten him rock hard
It was tough for him to get through your pregnancy because each time he looked at your growing belly he got turned on
“Johnny I’m already pregnant you know, we don’t have to keep trying,” you teased every time his hands began to wander down below your hips.
“Ah cannae help it, mama, you’re glowing!” He mutters trying to nuzzle under your shirt
Asked the doctor explicitly if pregnancy sex would hurt the baby.
“Johnny!” You hissed
“Need to know if I have to behave myself for nine months lass”
Thankfully the good-humored doctor laughed at his requests. Johnny listened intently as the doctor discussed the pros and cons of both the act and different positions with his chin resting on intertwined fingers. Soap asked question after question about your limitations much to your horror.
Once the appointment was over and you two were safely confined into your flat again, his hands were on you before the door had even closed.
“You heard the doctor's orders, Mama.”
You laughed loudly at that, “I don’t think they’re doctor’s orders as much as yours!”
“Then listen to your sergeant and let him take care of you”
“Yes, sir.”
Johnny was constantly stumbling over himself to try and help you with chores through the pregnancy. You move to wash a dish and he’s hopping up from the couch to plush the sponge from your hand before you’ve even wet it.
“I’ve got that love,” He constantly says, trying to herd you towards the couch, “Don’ even worry about it.”
You’d still hover each time, ensuring that he completed the chores to your satisfaction.
“Johnny! The yellow rags are for dusting! Not wiping up!” You fussed.
“It doesn’t matter! They all go in the wash the same!”
“It does matter! They’re color-coded so that they stay cleaner and we don’t go through so many!”
“Johnny,” You waddle into the bedroom one morning after getting up to get a cup of tea, “It’s time.”
“Time?” The tired man pulled his head up from where he’d buried it into his pillow, “Lass, is still early, come back to bed.”
“Johnny the baby’s not going to be born in the same bed it was conceived in.”
“Yer not due for weeks yet lass, she won’t be.”
“There’s a puddle in the kitchen that says otherwise.”
“A puddle?”
“Johnny, my water broke.”
He jerks his head up from the pillow, “It’s time?”
“Yes, Johnny, I have the bag, I just need you to get dressed and drive.”
He stumbles out of bed and shoves his legs into yesterday’s jeans from where they lay on the floor, he’s nearly to the door before you hold up a hand, “Shirt, Johnny, you’re going to the hospital. You need to put on a shirt.”
He looks down at his bare chest, “Shirt? Shirt,” He turns on his heel and scoops up yesterday’s shirt too before returning to you.
“Shoe’s, Johnny.”
Johnny grabs a pair of slides from the closet and you finally let him through, happy that he’s finally presentable for your daughter’s birth.
Johnny ends up pacing the room while you rest in the hospital bed, flipping through channels on the wall-mounted television, “Thought you said it was time lass.”
“It is,” you flip past game show, news, game show, soap opera.
“Then where is she? We've been here hours now.”
“They don’t just slide out, the body has to prepare itself to squeeze out a daughter who probably has as big a head as her daddy,” He doesn’t notice your insult, instead rubbing his hands over the stubble he hadn’t gotten to shave.
When Johnny see’s the baby crown, he faints.
Your big strong army man who had been through war and back fainted at the sight of his daughter entering the world and had to be woken up by an attending nurse, “Sir, you’re going to want to wake up, your baby’s coming now.”
He ends up on wobbly feet, deposited by the head of the bed this time where he surely won’t see anything to make him faint.
After the baby’s born he makes you promise that you won’t tell anyone on his team, particularly Ghost.
“I’ll never hear the end of it,” Soap begs, “L.t. would make it known base-wide before the day is out.”
You roll your eyes, “You don’t give Simon enough credit, he’s nothing but a gentleman to me.”
“Ya only say that because he hasn’t made you run drills! He’s a right mean bastard to me!”
Soap brings the baby on base to meet the 141 at your request after moaning that you didn’t want his team to see you when you were wearing mesh panties even if you were wearing pants over them. Soap loudly announced his arrival, depositing the large carrier onto the table in the briefing room.
“Here she is,” he coos at the baby in her carseat, pulling the blanket covering her off the carrier, “The latest addition to the Mactavish clan.”
“She’s so tiny!” Gaz can’t help but note, leaning forward.
“Didn’ think you actually had the balls to make one of them,” Ghost starts.
“How’s the missus doing?” Price asks, leaning forward to offer his finger to the bundle who takes it and grasps it.
“Sore as all hell and still mad abou’ it,” Soap bemoans, “Keeps telling me about the frozen pads she’s wearing and that it’s my fault!”
“Frozen pads?” Gaz frowns at him, finally taking his eyes off the baby.
“Aye, the lass has cleared out half the freezer so her unmentionables can be kept below thirty two degrees at all times.”
“You’re in a hell of your own making Soap, she’ll be right as rain before long and yelling at you for something else you’ve done.”
“Hope you learned to wrap it for next time, Soap,” Gaz this time.
“The poor bastard came out of the womb as dumb as this and he’ll return the same way, he’ll have another baby before this one’s out of diapers.
After the baby’s born, he takes you and her on a flight to visit the Mactavish clan. He insists on holding the baby through the flight so you could nap. He also falls asleep with the baby in his arms and his head laying on your shoulder.
His sister’s crowd around you before you can even take your shoes off when you enter the house.
The energy in the Mactavish house is the same as Soap’s when he’s first off deployment and wired, full of energy and yelling. You silently send a thanks up to heaven that the baby was already awake and well-rested as there likely would be no keeping this family quiet.
Johnny’s mother fussed over you, smoothing your hair and holding your hand, apologizing already for something her son did.
“Ma!”
“Don’ ‘Ma’ me! You gave me hell growing up, I have to make sure you’re treating her well!”
Baby Mactavish grows to be a whirlwind like her father, constantly getting into cabinets you swore you baby-proofed, leaving piles of tupperware scattered on the kitchen floor.
“Sergeant John Mactavish if you don’t come get your daughter this second!” You yell into the house while you fight against your daughter’s grip of steel on the plastic spatula.
He skids into the kitchen and scoops up the baby, turning her over in the air and using the element of surprise to snatch the utensil from her chubby hands.
“Ah, dinnae be so mean to the bairn lass, she’s jus’ explorin’,” he continues turning her over and over until she’s weak with giggles.
True to his word, Johnny gets you pregnant within a year after you're medically cleared. This time a second and third baby on the way. At once. When you learned of the split embryo at the ultrasound you scowled at Johnny, “Now see what you’ve done, John Mactavish!”
“Ah promised it to you, remember,” He took your hand in his and planted kisses on the back, ignorant of the ultrasound tech pointedly keeping their eyes on the screen, “Toldja we’d have a house-full when we first started dating.”
“I didn’t think you meant two at once!”
Not to mention the dogs that lingered on the stoop. Or the barn cats that hung around the outbuildings. The highland cows that Johnny had begged you for. The donkeys that he rescued from a feedlot. None of them were in the plan. Mactavish, the devil he is, ruins all your plans.
a/n: reblogs/comments are most appreciated but i cherish every like too, someone please talk more about this to me
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I'm so sorry for your loss
How does he feel after you blocked him?
☆How to chose the perfect pile for you?
1) Close your eyes.
2) Clear your mind (don't think of anything or anyone).
3) take a deep breathe.
4) Ask the question in your head.
5) Open your eyes, and the picture that you are drawn to the most is your pile.
☆Note:
- Thank you guys for 200 followers, we are growing so fast. I'm grateful to have you guys❤.
- In this reading we are going to reveal how your specific person feel when you blocked them and went no contact with them.
- This reading is for entertainment purposes only. Nothing is set in stone.
Stay safe
Arya❤
Pile 1 - Spell book
How is you current energy?
Pile one are you trying to lose weight for a wedding but obviously it is not working out? I see that you may be on a diet to lose the extra weight and to fit in that beautiful dress you bought but obviously you either not seeing any results or you are not taking the diet seriously. You may be falling at losing this weight. Anyways as a nutrition student I advise you to lower the carb intake but never cut it from your diet. And always remember that you ARE wearing the dress and NOT the dress wearing you. That's a thing, also I see that there's someone who is shaming you for gaining that weight. He might be a man from your family or a man you know? Don't listen to them pile 1. Losing weight needs effort, consistency and finally a lot of patience. You can't lose all that weight in a week or a month! Be patient. I see that this pile is so desperate to lose the weight and they are putting too much pressure on themselves to reach that goal. And if you are not trying to lose the weight. You might be working on a project with someone and that project caused you two to lose your money and now I see that it is going to be a short term money loss. Don't freak out pile one money come and go. You can always ask for help, ask someone to lend you some money. You'll repay them one day when they need it. Another thing I'm picking up on is that this pile are facing financial trouble because of a wedding? You might put too much money and effort into it that now you have a problem with finances?. Okay, the dominant energy on this pile are earth signs (Virgo, Taurus and Capricorn) you might have those placements in your chart or just the dominant element (earth) or dominant planet (Venus, Mercury or Saturn).
Now how does he feel after you blocked him?
So, looking at the cards in front of me this person might have been manipulating you emotionally. The cards also are telling me that he is untrustworthy. So please pile 1 don't fall into that trap again. Do not unblock him. I see that after you blocked him he might got it as a sign to move on from this connection. I see that he is taking his attention and dumping it on someone else. He might be a cancer with gemini placements? Be careful those type of men especially with those placements are super manipulative even if they subconsciously do it. I see that he is asking someone to reach out to you just to know how you are doing. This person is literally a border line psycho😂 I can't. Like he act like he is fine and cool without you but he is still watching your social media or taking the tea on you from a friend of yours or a friend of a friend. Anyways, I see that he is addicted to you. Like even your name make him tremble? I don't know why I got this feeling. He might also was dependent on you emotionally? Like he have dumped all his emotions and trauma into you? Pile 1 dear, he is not worthy of that and our job is not to fix those men. He is like in between two states 1) I should let her go because it is over and the other state is 2) but we could've been good together, there's still things I want to experience with her. Anyways, I see manipulation for some reason. He might manipulated you into thinking something about him that is not exactly the truth. I see that he is being childish of his needs and wants. He is like that baby who want to have his cake and eat it too. You see that person who says that he want a specific type of women but the thought of spending the rest of his life with them terrifies him? You might have his lilith in your sun sign. He is incredibly attracted but afraid of being with you.
Thank you for reading this pile 1. Take care and stay safe❤.
Pile 2 - The burning heart
How is your current energy?
Pile two are you walking away from a friend group? I see that you either walking away from a friend group or leaving an online community. That community might be toxic and it left you unbalanced and insecure? You might have lied to yourself that this community or people are going to make you happy but in fact they made you feel insecure and more triggered? You might be someone who was obsessed of looking like a model or like those IG girls but for some reason as you progressed in that group you started comparing yourself and your life to them? I see you conflicting between you and your inner world and vision but acting happy and positive in front of people. You might also got scammed by them? I see that they were promoting a product that should solve all your problems like magic but then you realize it was a scam? That product may destroyed your skin or gave you breakouts. This pile have water placements (Cancer, Scorpio and pisces) and earth placements (capricorn, virgo and taurus).
How does he feel after you blocked him?
Well, this group is hilarious 😂. I think he didn't know that you blocked him so he kept double texting you and there was no reply so he felt like he f up. I see that if this person is living in the same place as you or the same city he might actually take action to come in and see you. And if not then he felt incredibly confused and insecure. I feel like he might be the type of person that if he faced rejection or a block he let all his previous trauma resurface again and blame himself without actually changing. But hey, let's be honest those men demand you to change but he is literally rotten in his own self with his bad habits and emotional immaturity. I see that this person was eager to know you. Have you dated him pile 2? I don't see anything serious to be honest. It looks like a date or a hookup but not really a serious lover or a partner. He feels so insecure and not stable. He perhaps, wanted to give this connection a shot but was surprised by getting blocked? Lol. I can't it is so funny. Sorry pile 2, I think you should clarify things with him. Wait I will pull a couple of cards to see his energy. He might be a young adult, possibly between 20 and 29? I see that he tried to achieve success multiple times but that didn't really happen. He might opened or worked a series of jobs or businesses/projects but none of them worked. I see that he lied about being happy away from you but he is not. He really wanted this partnership he is so serious omg. Well, I think it is up to you if you want to pursue anything further with him but he is broke sooo it is up to you pile 2, if you want to keep in touch with him or unblock him. I don't know why I keep picturing a black man with braids. He might like wearing white clothes.
Thank you for reading pile 2, stay safe and take care ❤.
Pile 3 - Love magic book
How is your current energy?
I see that this pile are finally seeing the fruits of their labor. I see that pile 3 have been doing alot of inner work and practicing self care. I see that you guys might have realized the old patterns that kept you stuck. I see a lot of inner transformation. You may finally broke free from abusive partner/family or friendships. I see that the chapter you are closing made you insecure about moving on with your life. You may be scared and terrified to take action in your current circumstances. The cards are telling me you don't have the courage yet to approach life in a more optimistic way. I see that this pile are being faced with many decisions to make and there's a lot of opportunities that will give you the abundance you need. I see that this pile are not afraid to face their inner demons. Like as I mentioned above, you might started going to therapy or doing shadow work to deal with the darker side of yourself. This pile’s energy is so internal. I don't see you doing anything to be specific, I see you doing the mundane and being afraid to take higher risks. Guys I felt anxious all of sudden. Have you been dealing with anxiety? If you might be then I asked the cards on how to deal with it and they told me that you need to live in the present moment. Stop living in the future, what will happen will happen and you have no control over the outcome. The cards are encouraging you to embrace the moment and enjoy the blessings from the universe. I see that this pile will have an opportunity to improve their life. I see a job opportunity coming in for you and it will make you so happy. Guys I think life is not that serious so please don't overthink the stuff that you cannot control. Okay? Live your life guys. Anyways, I see a strong uranus and pluto energy. You might have those two planets dominant in your chart or you might be an aquarius, cancer or scorpio. That's what I'm picking up on. You don't have to have those placements if the description fit you correctly.
How does he feel after you blocked him?
I see that your person is practical and stubborn. He might be an aquarius, capricorn or have his sun in the 10th or 11th house in his chart. This person is refusing letting you go. The cards are all pointing to the opposite direction, I see that this person is so attached to you like a puppy. This person is boiling inside, his blood is on fire. I feel like he is feeling stuck and frustrated. He might have a lot of female friends or have a lot of sisters or female siblings. Whatever the case he is asking them to help him of his situation or just spending time with them to get over you. I think that he think what is between you two is not done or finished. He is so fixated on you. I feel like after you left he got depressed and sad. I feel like I'm losing hope. This person keeps himself dissociated by imagination. He keep imagining you two together. He didn't expect you to block him. I don't really see any movement, he is not moving at all. And if you are asking about him taking action towards you I don't see that happening honestly. He is just trapped in his head. He might have an IXXJ mbti (ISTJ,ISFJ, INTJ, INFJ)?. This person is not happy of how things are he is still thinking about you. I heard the phrase "you never left my mind/ imagination". I see that instead of healing and moving on he is distracting himself even more.
Pile 4 - The 3 of swords card
How is your current energy?
Honey why are sad? He doesn't deserve it. I feel like this pile is disappointed by someone they felt a connection with. This person might crossed your boundaries and even was rude to you. I don't really feel like you know this person well, like you see when we meet someone briefly and they leave quite a strong impression on us. I see that you expect this person to treat you in a way and unfortunately you got disappointed. I see that this person did not respect your privacy or personal space. I feel like you might have problem socializing with other? Or social anxiety? And that person was the last straw? Anyways give yourself some time to heal from that and move on. I feel like this pile are trying to be more courageous but they are overthinking and scared. You might be someone who do not trust others and feel so overwhelmed by people. I pulled a card for advice and they are telling you to step into your power, they are telling me that you are strong pile 4. You have this duality to you and if it is not about duality then you can switch masculine and feminine energy within you quite easily. Also trust your intuition. I feel like you have a female figure in your life who is very spiritual and connected to earth. Ask her for help and she will gladly help you. This is your pile if you have leo placements or fire placements in general. I see mars as a dominant planet too. So take what resonates.
How does he feel after you blocked him?
Well, I have two scenario cases in my head. The cards are telling me that he already moved on when you blocked him. He might have had a crush on someone so it was easy for him to move into that. I see that he still watch your social media but BUUT out of curiosity not love or because he want you back. The other case scenario is; he might be working on himself to manifest you. I see that this person is so patient and calculated. He might have other life responsibilities, this person might be old like between 25 and 35. I'm not getting any teenage vibes from this group. What he felt when you blocked him was anxiety and longing? You see those psycho people who do not understand themselves? So they confuse others? He might felt like it is time to move on emotionally but mentally he sometimes long and think about you. He doesn't really understand his emotions. He keeps them to himself. This person is done I'm not seeing any movement but what I do see is thinking deeply about you and unfortunately; his thoughts are manifesting or reaching you. He might send you messages telepathically? I don't know if you believe in telepathy, but after all it is physics and spirituality. I mean our thoughts are patterns and they have vibrations and frequencies so yes it can move from one person to another. If this person keep popping on your mind then he is manifesting you.
Thank you for reading this pile 4. Stay safe❤.
Post date: 31st/Aug/2024- Sat
*Feedback is appreciated
#free divination#free tarot#pick a card#pick a pile#tarot community#divination#divination readings#metaphysical#occult#tarot pac#tarotblr#tarot reading#tarot cards#tarotcommunity#spirituality#witchblr
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the love we share (two little lines part 4)
toji x reader
in which you go to your last appointment of your pregnancy with toji.
technically AFAB reader, but i've left it as gender neutral as possible.
wc: 1188
parts: 1 2 3
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goodness gracious does your back hurt. after carrying a whole other human in your body for over 37 weeks, you’re ready to give birth. unfortunately, the universe has other plans for you, and so instead of going to the hospital to give birth, you’re getting ready for yet another appointment.
you waddle around the house, ankles burning with your newfound weight, getting all of your records and doctor’s notes to bring with you to your appointment.
“toji! we need to go!” you yell, holding onto the handrail to make your way down the stairs. toji’s footsteps stomp down the hall, and he meets you at the bottom of the stairs, supporting you with a hand in yours.
“i got the keys already, and i got you a car snack so you don’t get sick,” he hands over a granola bar, and you feel your eyes well up with tears.
“i’m so in love with you,” you cry, and he wipes your cheeks. at this point, he is so used to your hormones that he does not even question why you’re crying.
“let’s go see our baby,” he says, and you nod, following him to the car.
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you’re laying on your back, cold lotion rubbed over your belly to aid the ultrasound. the doctor brings the machine over, and you see your baby once again.
“they’re beautiful,” you whisper, holding onto toji’s hand. looking over, you see your husband’s eyes full of light and love for your coming baby.
“yeah. they are.” he says softly, and you squeeze his hand.
“now, i know you’ve said that you don’t want to know the gender, but i just want to double check one more time,” the doctor asks, and you shake your head.
“we want it to be a total surprise,” the two of you had discussed this as you slowly moved into your second trimester, and you had both decided that you wanted to find out the baby’s gender when you give birth. in order to make it easier on your bank account, the nursery was full of both megumi and tsumiki’s old baby supplies, still giving you enough money to take care of the two kids.
“alright. well, the baby looks almost fully developed, and their heartbeat sounds normal. they should be coming sometime within the next week, and if you need anything, or if anything happens, please come see me again,” you and toji thank the doctor, and start the effortful journey back to the car, where you eventually slump into the passenger seat.
toji slides into the driver seat, hand resting on top of yours.
“so,” he begins, “how are you feeling?”
this is a question that he’s posed to you many times throughout the duration of your pregnancy, but with the idea of giving birth casting a shadow over you, it had never been more appropriate.
“i guess i’m nervous,” you say, completely understating your true feelings. you were positively terrified. all your life, you’d heard people recounting stories about how birth was one of the most painful things ever.
“you know you can’t lie to me, doll,” toji says, him squeezing your hand this time. you sigh, but nod.
“i’m so scared toji. i mean, it’s supposed to be some of the most insane pain of my life. also, what about the kids? a baby is exhausting, and i don’t want them to feel abandoned.”
“hey, breathe. remember how we talked about making time for the kids months ago? we will make it work. and you’re not alone, i’m here to help take care of all of our kids,” his large, warm hand comes to cup your cheek, and you lean against him.
“what if i’m not ready?” you ask, and he shakes his head.
“you’re already the world’s best step-parent, so raising our biological will be a walk in the park for you,” you laugh lightly, but he continues. “i’m serious. megumi and tsumiki really do like you more than me.”
“i doubt that. they love you,” your face breaks into a grin.
“which means that they love you a lot too,” toji smiles softly at you, and you don’t know if you can love someone more.
“stop being so handsome!” you exclaim, turning away from him.
“only when you stop being so attractive every single day,” he responds without missing a beat, amplifying your embarrassment.
“stop!” you laugh.
“i can’t, doll.”
how can you keep a normal heartrate around your beautiful husband when he compliments you like that? you turn your head back, staring at him.
“what? is there something on my face?” he asks, running a hand down said face.
“no. i’m just wondering how i got so lucky,” his ears turn pink, and he tries to cough to hide his blush.
“if anyone’s lucky in this relationship, it’s me,” he says, and you smile.
“can we just say we’re both lucky? we do live with megumi and tsumiki,” you both laugh, before pulling on your seatbelts.
“that sounds right. those brats are, well, brats, but they’re pretty cool too.”
“i’m pretty sure that’s a contradictory statement,” the car revs to life, and he hums.
“maybe. either way, they’re pretty cool kids.”
“wait. is toji fushiguro not calling his amazing kids brats for once? i’m shocked,” you feign shock, with your hand placed against your chest. he scoffs, pulling out of your parking spot.
“okay, i don’t always call my kids brats, and never to their faces. i can’t have them misconstrue my meaning,” his pretend annoyance at his kids is something you understand as sarcasm, but the kids might not.
“besides,” he continues, “we both know that they’re the greatest gifts the world has ever given us. and i’m sure baby #3 will be just as great a gift,” warmth envelopes your body as toji cups your belly, looking lovingly at your bump.
“we love you,” you whisper, rubbing your belly. while you know that most parents talk to their babies in the womb, you and your husband were more reserved. you mostly just told the baby how much you love them, and how excited you are for they to come home.
“yeah, we love you so much. so do megumi and tsumiki, though they might be grumpy teens when you’re old enough to know it,” toji says, and you laugh. the car develops into a serious silence, and you find toji looking at you with serene look in his eye.
“is something wrong?” you ask.
“no, nothing’s wrong. i’m just thinking about how i’m so grateful for you and our baby. my life is better because you’re in it,” toji can seem gruff or standoffish, but he can be such a sweet-talker to the people he loves.
“i thought i couldn’t fall more in love with you, and you’ve proved me wrong. you’re the best husband i could ask for,” you lean in, and he meets you halfway with a kiss.
“alright, should we go home?” he asks, holding your hand over the middle console.
“yes, we should.” you reply, the car crackling with warmth from the love you share.
#anime#jjk#manga#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen toji#toji fushiguro#jjk toji#toji x reader#toji x you#fushiguro toji#toji fluff#fushiguro toji x reader#not really edited lmao#pipwritesoccasionally
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